Keep Coming Back For More
by FroggyDarren
Summary: High school friends hardly ever last forever. They leave town, lose touch, move on... but sometimes things are left unsaid. Will they say them if they meet again? AU/AH Pairings: B/E, A/J, R/Em. Lemons included.
1. Prologue

Disclaimer: See Profile. I own nothing.

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**Prologue**

_Bella_

My eyes slowly opened and the eyelids fell back immediately due to the almost painful light. I tried to remember where I was from the bits I noticed around me, but my memory was a bit blurry. I rubbed my eyes to get them to open and looked around. As I moved, I felt someone's warmth next to me and pieces of the previous evening came to mind again.

I finally forced my eyes to open and look around, my surroundings confirming that what had gone through my mind was not just a dream. I was in his apartment and minute by minute, the evening that got me here ran through my aching head. I turned a little and saw him next to me, sleeping peacefully. I caringly moved the blanket over him as it slipped down, and sighed softly, trying not to wake him up.

The next thing I became aware of was that below the blanket I had just moved up was nothing but his body, no T-shirt, no pyjama, no shirt, nothing that I would see. I lifted the blanket gently and noticed he was not even wearing any sort of underwear. Moreover, I shivered a second later because the cool air blew under the blanket and I realized he was not the only completely naked one in the bed. Frantically, I turned around and tried to find my shirt or at least my underwear.

"Not again," I sighed, "somebody tell me we didn't do it again."

I tried not to talk to myself, but considering he was asleep and there was no one else around, which made me happy in fact, I said a few lines to myself, cursing my own stupidity; basically for allowing myself to get drunk, and letting him bring me to his place again.

My mind desperately tried to put the puzzle of separate memories together, but It did not really get further than to the moment I'd met him, as the evening was very hazy in my memory from about the third drink I'd had. I knew we were at one of our favourite clubs last night and I knew we had not come there together. I'd bumped into him at the bar and we had started to chat, then dance and then back to the bar. From then on, I did vaguely remember us dancing again for a while and even singing karaoke, but the moment we decided to leave did not come to my mind at all. Almost as if I had pushed it out of my mind deliberately because I had not wanted to know that I'd left with him.


	2. 01 House of dreams

**AN: I don't own anything. Well, technically I own ... not, not even that. Oh and the characters in this are all Stephenie's. **

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**House of dreams**

_Bella_

"Bella!"

"Geez, Alice, what now?" I breathed out.

My best friend ran towards me, a huge smile in her face and I frowned, wondering what crazy thing she was so excited about this time. She always managed to rope me into stuff that I would have tried to make a mile wide arch around. Alice is a bouncy pixie though, who makes up for her height and tiny frame with her noisiness. It was not always a bad thing, but I would've prefered if she had left me out of it most of the time.

"What is it this time, Alice?"

"You're not going to believe this, Bella," she laughed, obviously eager to share her news, "I'm so happy now! I just got the best news ever!"

"No games, pixie, I'm tired, remember?"

"Oh yeah, did you finish the project?"

"Yes, no thanks to you," I stuck my tongue out at her.

College was getting close to the summer break and the professors were literally drowning us in paperwork that needed to be finished ... well, yesterday. Alice of course; like a bunny on Red Bull, had everything finished way before time and hadn't even tried to understand why those of us who were on human speed weren't able to keep up. Despite my protests, she kept dragging me shopping, clubbing or doing whichever activity she decided to participate in.

"Oh well sorry, Bella," she rolled her eyes, "I just tried to get you to have some fun."

"Hm, fun, I'm sure working in Newton's for the rest of my life will be fun, too."

"Come on, Swan, you're not going to fail anything and you know that."

"I barely managed to hand this project in on time, Alice."

"Drama queen," I heard her mumble under her breath.

"Miss Tantrum spoke, ladies and gentlemen."

Alice shot me a warning look, but I could see the giggles threatening to burst out of her any second. Our eyes met and we both started laughing uncontrollably, attracting a few looks from people passing by, but here on campus, most of the students were well used to Alice's noise levels. I cringed at the looks though, hating the attention as usual. Being Alice Brandon's best friend was not my wisest decision ever, in terms of keeping my anonymity, but three years later, I was almost used to it.

"Now, what's this big news you have for me, pixie?" I managed to ask when the giggles subsided.

"Oh Bella, it's so cool," she started bouncing immediately, "you know how we have to stay here for the summer?"

"Thanks, I just stopped thinking about that this morning," I growled at her.

"It won't be so bad now, I promise," Alice bounced again; "we won't be on campus."

Both Alice and I were caught in a summer internship that, despite our professors' promise, ended up taking place at college and not in Seattle as we'd hoped. Alice's fashion design degree required that she put on a full fashion show and my writing and editing course had a published book or story as a part of the grade. While she was let down from her hopes to work with an actual fashion house, she totally embraced the chance to design, organize and direct a whole show on campus this summer. I was stuck in the college newsletter, though, a job that I only took slightly willingly over that summer because it was actually paid. The only thing was that I could not afford an apartment outside campus and I was not going to let Alice's parents pay for one.

"Alice!"

"Before you start, Bella, I'm not paying for anything."

"O-kay," I eyed her suspiciously, "Who is, then?"

"Jasper's spending the summer here and he couldn't find anything smaller than a five bedroom house and Emmett and Rose have jobs here too and they're staying with him and he said that we were welcome to the other two rooms because he's not paying for the house anyway because the museum is covering the costs…"

"Alice, deep breath," I laughed.

"I'm just so happy, Bella," she grinned, "I thought I'd barely see him all summer."

I understood her feelings way too well, thanks to the way she'd talked about him ever since we'd known each other. Jasper Whitlock was the man who'd cast a spell over Alice when they'd first met and the man whom according to her, held her heart forever. The soppiness of it all vanished when they were together, because it was painfully obvious that they were like extensions of each other.

The thought of the whole bunch of us spending the summer together was appealing. Though we all ended up in Forks in high school, we went our separate ways for college and only Alice and I stayed together. Even so, we were doing different courses, so while we lived together, I did not see Alice as much as I would like. Rose and Emmett had ended up at the same college in Cali, too, but that made no difference since they avoided each other like a pest. I have never gotten the full story on what had happened between them then, but as far as Alice told me, they got together when they were juniors, the year before I landed in Forks, and things did not go too well. Emmett, being a member of the football team, did not have enough time for a girlfriend and Rose was not willing to be one of his ever-willing fan club members. Therefore, by the time I'd got to know them, they were barely on speaking terms, a situation that was slightly awkward at times, since we were a fairly tight-knit bunch.

"Bella, this is going to be so awesome!" Alice was bouncing on the spot.

"Down, girl," I laughed, but I was quite happy about the chance to escape campus myself.

Jasper was a year ahead of us in high school and he and Alice were inseparable by the time I arrived. He ended up working in Seattle's Museum of History and Industry, but he often went on research trips, which broke Alice's heart a little every time. Now she kept explaining to me how the museum pretty much bought him a house and offered him a permanent position with research trips becoming a lot less frequent. Therefore, for the summer, we were all set in his place and Alice was dragging me to the car now so that we would go see it.

"Alice, I have…"

"It won't take long, I promise," she said half-convincingly, "You do want to get first dibs on the rooms, don't you? Rose and Emmett are not here until tomorrow!"

So I let her drag me to her car and literally fell into the seat, tired past the point of caring. Alice drove in her usual maniac style, but this time I was not complaining. The house was surprisingly close to campus and I was glad that I would not have to invest too much into getting to the office on days when Alice would stay home. Which, guessing by the fact that she was explaining how Jazz could do a lot of work from home, would be most of the days. I laughed to myself at her cheerfulness as we were climbing out of the car. Then I looked at the house and fell in love.

It was a small town house with a little garden in the front, hedges disguising most of the space from the street's view and noise and a wide staircase leading up to the front door. I followed a still-bouncing Alice up the stairs and waited for her to ring the doorbell. Jasper opened and she immediately flew into his arms.

"Hi, Bella," he greeted me, peeking over her shoulder.

"Hey," I laughed, "how are you, Jas?"

"Great now."

"So you're a very important employee now," I raised my eyebrow, "judging by the house."

"W-ell," he gave me an innocent look, "I might have asked for something that would house more than me…"

Alice and I laughed at his admission but I was not entirely surprised. I figured that at some point he would find a way to move in with her and this was very convenient. We walked into the house and got the grand tour from Jasper, peeking into the kitchen on the side, admiring the upright piano in the sitting room and the sophisticated sound system around the TV set. Our rooms were all upstairs, two on each level and a converted attic that Jasper had already claimed as his. Alice chose the one that was right next to the staircase to the attic, unsurprisingly and I walked into a small room with the door underneath that same staircase. Without hesitation, I threw my purse onto the bed and looked around, immediately feeling at home.

"Hey, no fair," Alice ran in, "this one has a balcony!"

"Too late, pixie," I laughed, "you chose your room first anyway."

Alice pouted for a minute, but then she had a look around Jasper's attic room and decided that she would take advantage of some of the storage space there. He was not in the slightest surprised, in fact, I guessed that half of his closet was reserved for her from the start.

"So, when are we moving?" I looked at Alice after we returned downstairs.

"Tomorrow?"

"Oh," I eyed her suspiciously, "what about packing? And arranging transport?"

"Done," she laughed, "I knew you'd like the place."

"You're the devil, you know that?" I scowled at her, "How am I supposed to pack everything by tomorrow?"

"I'll help you, Bella, don't worry. My stuff is almost done already."

"OK, back up a second there," my eyes were fixed on her face, "how long did you know about this?"

"Umm…"

"Jasper?" he looked up at me.

"I told Alice last week," he admitted, "but you had all those projects, so we didn't want to distract you."

They both looked apologetic, so I decided to let it go. The house was beautiful and I was looking forward to moving in. It was only my reluctant approach to change that made me hesitate, but I pushed it away and smiled.

"Fine, pixie, we need to go pack," I stood up and she followed me, giggling.


	3. 02 All together now

AN: I still don't own anything. A broken heart maybe.

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All together now **

_Alice_

"You're good, pixie, you're just too good," Bella sighed dramatically as she watched me pack her clothes into pre-prepared boxes.

She had not noticed how I'd managed to pack most of the unused kitchen and bathroom appliances over the past week, since her nose was stuck in books most of the time. Only reluctantly did she join me on shopping trips when I knew Jazz was going to be in our apartment, moving some of the heavier stuff into the house's basement. Bella could be slightly unobservant, especially when her mind was focused on minor details like schoolwork. Now she looked like she quite appreciated having been left out of most of the packing, so I threw myself into finishing up going through her closet.

"Bella!" I grabbed a piece of fabric, "You don't seriously still have this?"

"Why?" she gave me an innocent look that said she was obviously hiding something.

"Wait a second. That's a UW jersey!" I stared at the washed out sign on the front of the grey top.

"And?" Bella's cheeks turned bright red.

"There's only one person I know who would own a UW jersey," my mind went crazy at the realization, "Bella, that's not Edward Masen's jersey, by any chance?"

"And if it is?" my best friend shocked me, since she generally never divulged information like this.

"Where did you get this? How did you get this? I thought…" I made a mistake when I first grabbed this, thinking it was her old Forks High jersey that we all ceremoniously burned as we left the school.

"Yes, Alice, I burned mine," Bella grinned, knowing what I thought, "I got this at the barbecue at Rose's place, our senior year, remember?"

Now it was my turn to blush slightly as I remembered that barbecue very well. Jasper and I were otherwise engaged most of that day and I was glad that his adoptive parents hadn't noticed us missing for such long periods. On the other hand, maybe they had, but I was not going to let my thoughts go that direction.

"But why do you still have it?" I decided to turn attention on Bella again.

"I just never gave it back," she smiled, trying to look innocent.

"Have you seen him since?"

"No, I don't think anyone besides Rose has seen Edward since we all left Forks," Bella breathed out, obviously glad the questioning was going a different direction, "I think she visits him, but he never spends holidays in Forks anymore. Something to do with Rose's and his parents getting into a fight or something, Rose never went into much detail."

"I wonder if he's still in Seattle," I wondered, trying to think of a way to orchestrate a reunion.

My thoughts were interrupted by a loud banging on the door and I my eyes followed Bella as she went to let our visitor in. I heard laughter from the hall and Bella's scream.

"Emmett, stop," she giggled, "put me down, now!"

"Come on, I haven't seen you in months," our brother bear's voice was spiked with laughter, "and where's my little sister?"

"Don't you dare, Emmett!" I tried to protest, but found myself picked off the floor and flying through the air in a circle.

"So girls, ready to go?" Jazz laughed from the doorway and I automatically struggled out of my stepbrother's embrace into Jasper's arms.

"Almost," I mumbled between kisses, only vaguely aware of the laughter behind my back, "all my stuff, the kitchen gear and the bathroom bits are done, though," I looked at him, smiling, "it's just Bella's closet and books that are a bit of a problem," my eyes darted back to meet Bella's glare.

"Thank you, Alice, I think we all know what you think of my closet and what your relationship with books is like," Bella tried to sound offended but ruined it with a fit of laughter that followed.

One look at Emmett made me realize why and if it were not for Jasper holding me, I would have punched him in the face. He knew not to make fun of me, yet he could not seem to resist.

"Come on, Al," he laughed, "let's get this show on the road."

The two boys started moving boxes into the van that they'd parked at the front entrance of our dorm. While they were running up and down the stairs, Bella and I finished packing up her clothes and started checking the place for whatever we'd left behind. Unfortunately, we did not have the option of coming back, as the dorm manager decided that since we had decided to move out, we were not welcome anymore. Jasper and Emmett were working fast and soon everything we owned was nicely boxed up and stuffed in the van.

"Now, who's driving?" Emmett stood in front of the van, looking at each of us for a second.

"Not you, anyway," I grabbed the keys out of his hands, "I want my possessions to get home in one piece."

"I have to take Bella over anyway," he grinned at me, "so you and Jazz can go play house."

Before I could once again jump to hit him, Jasper pulled me to the van and opened the driver's door for me. We climbed in and I took one last look at the dorm before we drove over to the house. As we turned around the corner, I found the parking spot in front of the house occupied by a bright red BMW.

"Hey, Rose is here!" I laughed and pulled up behind her car.

"Hey guys," the blonde beauty sat on the staircase, waiting for us, "Jasper, you forgot to give me the key yesterday."

"Oh sorry, sis," Jasper unlocked the front door and grabbed a set of keys from a hook inside, "there you go," Rose smiled at him, "now go pick your room, it's the first floor."

Rosalie walked up the stairs to the first floor and I turned to Jasper, knowing my eyes revealed my worry about the living arrangements.

"Did you tell her she'll be sharing her bathroom with Emmett?"

"Oh," Jazz's hand met his forehead, "Do you think she'll be mad?"

"Expect fireworks," I simply stated, "and not the good kind."

"It might make them see the light, though," Jasper smiled, "they were way too good together and now that Em has his priorities right…"

"You know," I laughed, kissing him, "you might have a point there, sweetheart."

"Man," he rolled his eyes, "you're rubbing off on me."

"Hm," my lips met his again, "care to take this upstairs now?"

"Hey guys!" Emmett's booming voice interrupted us, "so where's my room?"

"About that…" I looked at Emmett with a slightly apologetic look, but I didn't get to explain anything.

"So who am I sharing the bathroom with?" Rose was coming down the stairs, "because I kind of already claimed the few shelves that are in there."

"Rosalie," Emmett's face froze mid-smile.

"McCarthy," she barely looked at him, then she shot me a look and her face went through a few emotions at once, "Oh no, Alice, no way!"

"Rose…" I wondered how to calm her down, but my mind went blank.

"Look sis," Jasper walked over to her, "you know he's never in the bathroom, so you won't have to see him much," he tried to explain, "just imagine sharing with Alice, you wouldn't be able to get in."

Rosalie stormed up the stairs, mumbling something about packing again and I looked at Jasper. It was obvious she was ready to give up, and go looking for a place of her own. Jasper walked up after her, throwing me a look that calmed me down a little. Emmett just stood there, his face showing his confusion, disappointment and anger all at once.

"She hates me, doesn't she?" he said in a small voice, which was extremely untypical of him, "maybe I should…"

"No, Em," I smiled, "Jazz is going to calm her down, it will be fine."

"But…"

"No, it will be fine. We will at least have a truce here if nothing else. I'm sick of my best friends fighting."

"OK, Alice," he nodded, "I just…"

"There will be rules, McCarthy," Rose stated, standing at the top of the staircase, "I'll write them down for you and if you as much as try to break any of them, you'll regret it."

She stomped back into her room and Emmett fell down onto the sofa he was leaning against, breathing out in relief, but still not smiling. I sat down on the armrest next to him and wondered whether we would have a Cold War going for most of the summer. It was obvious that Emmett didn't want to fight with Rose, but she was set in her stance when it came to him, so it would take a lot of work to set things right here.

"It will be fine, Em," I whispered, "It will work out OK," I said, partly trying to convince myself, partly trying to put his mind at ease, "Rose just needs to calm down a little and get used to being here," we both jumped as a door upstairs slammed.

The summer had officially started. I looked at Bella who only now dared to enter the house and smiled. There was unpacking to do and then we were going shopping and celebrating the move.


	4. 03 Reunion

**AN: I tried, but I still don't own the characters. **

**Thanks for the reviews, by the way, if I missed replying to any ;)  
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**Reunion**

_Edward_

The phone rang just as my head was falling down onto the pillow for a well-deserved rest after the previous week's madness. The assignments I was given were once again catching up on me and the four deadlines I had in the last month alone were enough to keep me from sleeping for the whole week. Typically, now that I had time to relax, someone would come up with something more that needed to be done and I was tempted to just let the phone go straight to the answering machine. My head was ready to explode, but I realized that if I didn't answer, it would only wait for me after I woke up, so I grabbed the phone and grumbled into it.

"Edward!" Alice's chirpy voice almost made me jump, "How are you?"

"Sleepy," I yawned, but smiled.

"Oh sorry, I didn't expect you to be asleep now," she giggled, "is college that exhausting or is it your social life?"

"You don't beat around the bush, do you," I rolled my eyes, laughing now, "I'm trying to finish next semester, so it's a bit of a double workload these days."

"Ah," she paused, "you could do with a break then, right?"

"Why are you asking, Alice?"

I grew a little suspicious, since Alice generally had at least one extra agenda going, no matter what she asked. She was most likely planning a night out with Jasper, whom I ran into in town the day before and I knew she would try to set up a reunion meeting. The three of us I could handle and while she was thinking of a response, I was already considering calling Rose so that she could join us. Since our parents got into that stupid fight because of as inheritance or something, I haven't seen my cousin as much as I would want to. And not seeing her much meant that I hadn't seen Jasper or Alice or the rest of the gang either since the barbecue Rose's parents threw when we all graduated.

"Well, actually," Alice quickly explained about Jasper moving to Seattle, how he had a house provided for by the museum and that her, Rose, Emmett and Bella Swan moved in together, "so we're heading out tonight for some sort of celebration and I thought you might want to join the old gang."

"Oh, so you all live together now?" I laughed, then pretended to be offended, "how come no one asked me?"

"Don't you have your fancy post-grad apartment?"

"Would've been nice to be asked, though," the charade was firmly in place.

"I'm sorry Edward, we never thought…" Alice sounded remorseful, "it was just so quick and Emmett needed a place and Rose…"

"It's OK, Alice," I laughed, "but seriously, you have Rosalie and Emmett under one roof? Is that safe?"

"Hopefully," she breathed a sigh of relief, "they're sharing a bathroom, too."

"That I have to see. Count me in for the party."

"OK…" she launched into details of where we were going to meet up, what I should wear, how soon I was supposed to be there and who was going to come with whom.

After Alice hung up, my head fell back onto the pillow and I fell into a relaxing nap, so that I would be at least partially awake later in the evening. Once I woke up, I realized I still had tons of time to get ready and get to the club we were supposed to meet at, so I got dressed and went out to grab a bite to eat. There was no way I was going to drink on an empty stomach while I was this exhausted and telling Alice that I wasn't drinking at all was just not an option. She had specifically mentioned that none of the others were driving, so I was sure we were all in for a night reminiscent of the times when Jasper and I used to sneak bottles of wine and vodka out of our parents' houses for the gang.

My phone rang again halfway through my dinner and I answered it only to hear Alice's excited giggles, revealing that they'd already started the drinking session before they even left the house. I decided that I had to be able to keep up with them to save myself from being the babysitter for the night, I headed straight for the club without the walk I planned to take. My meal was quickly finished and I called a taxi to pick me up from the restaurant, so I would get to the club faster. I couldn't find any of the others, so I sat down at the one spot at the bar that gave me a clear view of the entrance and the dance floor and ordered a shot of vodka to get me started. The alcohol seemed to soothe my body and revive it, despite the sleepiness that I felt catching up with me again.

It took a good while and several vodka shots before I saw Alice bouncing down the steps and head straight towards me. Jasper was right behind her, but I couldn't see Emmett or Rose anywhere. We got chatting and Jasper offered me a tequila shot, which I gladly threw down my throat.

"So Jasper, what's this about you guys moving in together?" I asked at some point of the conversation.

"Oh, that…" I saw his face going a dark shade of red, "well, what did you hear?"

"Just that the whole gang is back together," I laughed, "in a house that miraculously happened to be offered to you."

"I kind of asked for it," he looked into his glass.

"Figures," that much I knew before I started this conversation, "how are you planning to keep Rose under control, though?"

"Well, see," Jasper shot a look at the dance floor to make sure Alice was out of earshot, "I think Rose and Emmett are idiots for not being together."

"So you decided to help?"

"Something like that, yeah…"

"Well, good luck with your mission," I threw back another shot.

The evening went on and I felt myself becoming seriously drunk, thanks to the combination of Jasper's encouragement to drink more tequila and the fact that I was tired beyond reason. Rose and Emmett eventually showed up, sat down at opposite sides of the table and glared at each other, so I decided to drag Rose away for a chat. Not that I was in any state to talk properly, but she eventually ended up just as drunk and when Alice tore herself away from Jasper's side, we landed on the dance floor, entertaining Jas for a while with our attempts at dancing. Well, I was the one attempting to dance and the girls showed off their perfect moves. And then she walked in, without warning.

"Alice?" I couldn't tear my eyes away from the table where Jas and Em sat, "Who is that?"

"That's Bella Swan, Masen, don't you remember her?" Rose gave me a slap on the back of my head and I immediately remembered the shy girl who had used to hang out with us in Forks.

"B-but…" I stuttered.

"She's all grown up," Alice laughed, "that's what happens."

My eyes were stuck on the beautiful young woman at the table, her long hair coming down in chocolate colored waves streaked through with red highlights, her dark blue top clinging to the mesmerizing curves just like her washed out jeans did around her long legs, her brown eyes flicking to us then falling down to the ground. Her cheeks turned red when she noticed me staring, my mouth hanging open in shock. I noticed Alice running over to the table and dragging Jas and Bella down to the dance floor, while I was trying to compose myself again.

"Hey Bella," I managed to gulp down and keep my voice steady.

"Edward," she smiled up at me, her eyes shining in the club lights, "it's been a while. I barely recognized you."

"Me either," my voice shook a little, "I mean…"

"Go on, guys, it's a dance floor, not a chat room," Alice bounced around us.

Bella stumbled and I reached out my hand and beckoned her closer, blushing furiously and mumbled that she didn't know how to dance. I lifted her up onto my feet, glad that a slow song started and she followed my lead, leaning into my chest. I was sure she'd hear my breathing speed up and I thought I saw Alice throwing us a sideway glance, grinning mischievously. In my drunken haze, I didn't bother paying it too much attention and I hugged Bella tighter, letting the music lead our moves.


	5. 04 One Tequila, Two Tequila

Disclaimer: I don't onw anythying... seriously, I'm so broke the bank will be after my clothes next.

AN: OK, sorry for the delayed update :( Life happened. Thanks for the reviews ;)

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**One tequila, two tequila…**

_Bella_

"No, Alice, I don't need any more clothes," I groaned as the pixie dragged me into yet another shoe store in the mall.

"Bella, we're going out and none of your clothes are decent enough."

"That's hardly a compliment, Alice," my eyes pierced straight through her, "I should just walk away now, before you seriously offend me."

"Come on, we're almost done," she laughed and dragged me into the shop.

After the day of packing, unpacking, and trying to keep Rose and Emmett from killing each other, Alice had decided that it was time to celebrate our new quarters. But of course, a simple housewarming party was not enough for Miss Brandon, so she'd planned an elaborate celebration in town in the space of about half an hour. I never understood how she managed to do these things, but she usually chalked it down to her contacts and none of us dared to question her. We learned that Alice in planning mode was like a rocket about to take off and it was definitely not a safe thing to interfere with. She just graciously took us on the ride with her, which unfortunately for me mostly involved shopping for her new outfit. This time she decided, having been the one to pack my wardrobe, that I needed something new.

I had to admit, the navy blouse Alice had found was beautiful and surprisingly not too expensive and Alice managed to pick jeans that fit me perfectly. Now she was only on a mission for shoes to go with the outfit and I had to stop her from picking the highest stilettos in the mall, reminding her of the menace I would be if I wore something that high. Once she was happy with my choice, she actually allowed me to go to the office, after my pleading, that I had to put some work into the first article I was assigned.

The hours flew by and I never noticed I was running late until my phone literally jumped at me.

"Bella!" Alice sounded panicky, "are you ready to go?"

"Crap," I looked at the clock, "No."

"Get off the computer now and get home, we'll meet you in the club," came the pixie's order, "wash your hair, just blow dry it and let it fall onto your shoulders, put on the make-up I left in your bag and get here."

"Thanks Mom," I growled, "do you want to come here and dress me?"

"No time, I'll just have to trust you to get it right," Alice hung up on me.

I dragged myself into the shower and followed Alice's orders, grabbing a cup of coffee and putting together a sandwich, knowing that the rest of the gang would've eaten on the way. As a safety measure, I forced myself to eat, since I remembered Emmett's penchant for handing out shots on nights out, so going out hungry was out of question. Once I was dressed to Alice's specifications, I called for a taxi, running extremely late, not even remotely ready to face the pixie's wrath.

The club was dark and smoky and I stood on the steps past the entrance, trying to find any of my friends in the crowd. My eyes immediately scanned the area around the bar, expecting Emmett to be stationed there pretty much permanently, especially with Rose around. As I guessed, Jasper and Em were at the table closest to the bar, throwing shots down their throats, laughing at someone on the dance floor. I followed their line of sight and my jaw dropped down to the floor as I saw Alice and Rose showing off their moves along with an extremely drunk Edward Masen. He towered over Alice, his hair reflecting the lights of the club, but the typical bronze shade was still very obvious.

"Bella!" Em threw his arms around me when I finally managed to struggle through the crowd to their table.

"Hey," Jasper hugged me too, "you're looking great."

"Alice's work," I blushed, my eyes darting to the dance floor, "What's Edward doing here?"

"Pixie called him," Emmett answered and then chuckled; "some reunion, huh?" he handed me a shot glass that I immediately threw into my mouth, shivering at the burn.

My face was still turned to the dance floor as I took in the sight of Edward, he was trying to move to the rhythm of the music, but struggling most likely because of the alcohol the guys must have been drinking. He was normally a really good dancer, as I recalled, having seen him on various occasions like proms and random nights out. His eyes suddenly shot up to mine, clearly tracing along my body and I turned away, feeling the rush of blood into my cheeks. I grabbed the closest glass off the table and drank some more, realising very quickly that what I thought was only Coke had a good bit of rum inside. A moment later, Alice came bounding over and grabbed Jasper's and my hand, dragging us over to the dance floor.

"Alice, what…" I tried to protest in vain.

Before I knew it, I found myself standing in front of Edward and watched Alice dance off with Jazz and Rose.

"Hey Bella," Edward smiled at me, looking a little bit more sober then when I'd walked in.

"Edward," I couldn't help but blush again, "it's been a while. I barely recognized you," the lie slipped through my lips.

"Me either. I mean…"

"Go on, guys, it's a dance floor, not a chat room," Alice laughed as she danced past us again.

I took a step towards Edward, whose hand was reaching out to me now, and in true Bella fashion, stumbled before I could even finish the step. His hands wrapped around my waist and he pulled me closer to stop me from landing on the ground.

"I can't dance," I mumbled, once again feeling the blood in my cheeks.

The music changed to a slow song and I felt Edward lifting me up onto his feet, swaying in time with the rhythm, obviously more comfortable than with the R&B earlier.

After the song ended, we walked back to the table and we were greeted by a row of tequila shots and a grinning Emmett, challenging us to drink a few each. My head started spinning after the third one and I went to sit down next to Edward, but before I could tell him to move, he pulled me onto his lap, handing me another shot.

"I can't drink anymore guys," I sighed as Jasper offered me another glass, "I've barely eaten anything."

"Oh come on, Swan," Emmett chuckled, "you didn't use to be such a lightweight."

"Whatever, McCarthy," I rolled my eyes, grabbing a can of Coke that Alice handed me, "Thanks Al."

We kept laughing and I knew Edward and Emmett's drinking challenges were getting both of them completely wasted. Not much later Alice and Jasper decided to quite literally drag Em home once he started to sing along every song that started playing and attracted unwanted attention. Edward refused to budge, so Rose and I offered to stay on for a bit, not wanting to leave him on his own, especially without a ride home.

"Rosie…" Edward mumbled a while after the other three left, "I've missed you…"

"Edward, you're drunk, let's get you home," Rosalie sighed, helping me up off his lap and dragging him up off the seat.

"I don't wanna…" he mumbled, slurring his words.

We somehow managed to pull him out of the club and towards the taxi that Rose called on the way to the door. Edward fell into the backseat and Rose gave the driver the address of Edward's apartment as she slid into the front seat, leaving me no option but to squeeze myself into the small space left in the back. The drive to Edward's place was short, but the fresh air caused my head to spin even worse than inside the club and I had to stop at the front door and lean against the wall.

Edward found his keys after a bit of a struggle with the pockets on his coat and stumbled into the apartment, heading straight for the kitchen. I ran a glass of water for both of us, but before I could hand it to him, he was already on his way to his room, shedding his shirt off halfway across the living room. The sight of his bare back shook me a little and I turned away to stare at the kitchen wall to calm my breathing and my racing heart.

Rose walked out of Edward's room after a minute and smiled at me.

"He's out cold," she laughed, "trust him to get totally wasted before he even gets to talk to someone."

"We should leave some water for him," I pointed to the glass in my hand, "he'll need it for the morning."

"Go ahead, I'll call us a taxi," Rose walked out into the hall, pulling out her phone.

My hands were still shaking as I walked into the bedroom and I almost fell over the clothes on the floor that Edward left behind. He was tucked in his bed, the covers outlining the shape of his body and I couldn't help but stare at the peaceful smile on his face. I left the glass on his bedside table and pulled out a few of the painkillers from my purse, placing them next to the water.

"Come on, Bella," Rose called out from the living room, "taxi's downstairs."

I took one last look at Edward and smiled as he curled up under the blanket, looking very young when he was sleeping. Rose handed me my jacket as we walked out the door and I spent the drive home wondering why I had butterflies in my stomach every time I recalled Edward's face.


	6. 05 Erase and Rewind

Disclaimer: I don't own a thing. Or at least nothing in this story besides the main storyline idea. And even that is probably not so original.

**AN:** Once again, this took me longer to post that it should've. Sorry. Thanks to everyone who reviewed :) And everyone who's sticking with this story... I will keep updating, honestly :)

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**Erase and Rewind**

_Edward_

My head felt as if it were going to explode as I was woken by the cool breeze in my apartment. The chill shook me and I pulled my blanket tighter around myself, my eyes tracing around the room. I knew I was at home, but my brain didn't seem to have any information about how I'd gotten there. The previous night started to come back to me very slowly and painfully and I could still taste the tequila in my throat. I caught sight of a glass of water on my bedside table and the painkillers next to it. I swallowed two of them, as my fingers tried to scroll through the numbers in my phone for someone who'd give me answers.

"Edward, hey!" Alice's chirpy voice was like daggers flying into my head.

"Quiet, please," I groaned and heard her laugh, "Alice, what happened last night?"

"You don't remember?" she sounded shocked.

"I remember tequila. And I remember dancing," I winced at the thought, "but how did I get home?"

"I don't know, Edward, Jas and I had to bring Emmett home and you stayed there."

"I got home, though," my eyes closed, then immediately shot open as I realised, "there's a glass of water on my table and painkillers and…"

As I was saying that, I noticed the lack of clothes on my body and found them a second later on the ground next to my bed. My voice faded, I wasn't going to share that with Alice, but it made me even more confused. I couldn't remember undressing and I definitely wasn't someone who'd think of preparing water and painkillers for the morning. So I figured there was only one person who'd actually care about me enough to do any of this.

"Alice, did Rose get home with you?"

There was a silence on the end of the line as Alice obviously contemplated the answer. I wasn't sure what that meant, but her hesitation made me determined to find it out. Someone had brought me home and I was fairly sure it hadn't been the bartender, especially now that the pixie wouldn't give me a simple answer.

"Alice?"

"Edward, how much _do_ you remember?"

"As I said, I remember tequila. Lots of tequila, that's as far as my memory goes. And you dragged me out to the dance floor…"

My voice faded as I started remembering more details from the previous night and what else had happened. Then one face appeared in front of me and I suddenly understood why Alice wasn't giving me the answer I asked for.

Bella Swan.

The face flashed before my eyes and I took a deep breath as I started to recall the moment she'd walked through the door, the short distance from the dance floor where Alice had left me to bring Bella over, Bella stumbling and falling into my arms. Little bits of the night came back to me in bursts that forced me to blink a few times as I began to wonder just how badly I'd embarrassed myself in front of her.

"Edward?" Alice's voice came through in a very untypical timid whisper.

"Alice," I gulped, "did Bella bring me home?"

"Yes, she did. Rose was there, too, though."

"Did either of them say anything to you?" I was trying to search my memory for anything at all beyond the night club, but I didn't succeed.

"Rose said you passed out pretty much on your way to bed," Alice giggled, "I haven't seen Bella yet today."

"Oh," I wondered what that meant.

"Do you want to come over for dinner? We're having a smaller and quieter house-warming," she laughed, "Apparently, drinking plus men is not a good combination."

We agreed on a time and I asked for directions to their new place before Alice hung up, mumbling something about going shopping for painkillers and hangover remedies. After a while, I managed to drag myself out of bed and into the shower, feeling every step and every movement as my head pounded mercilessly. Eventually, I started feeling almost human, so I got dressed and set off on a walk towards Jasper's house, not trusting myself to drive.

"Mr. Masen, how good to see you," Rosalie greeted me when I walked up to the front steps of their house, "How's the head?"

I grunted in response, still not feeling up to small talk, since the fresh air had only managed to make my headache worse than it was earlier. Rose opened the door for me and showed me the way to the sitting room, offering to bring me a glass of water, which I gladly accepted. The sofa in front of the fireplace looked extremely inviting, so I let myself fall down on it, stretched my legs, let my head fall back and closed my eyes.

"Rose, did you see the bag I had with me yesterday?" a slightly raspy voice came from the staircase.

"Should be on the recliner," Rose shouted back from the kitchen.

My eyes opened a fraction just in time to see Bella coming to an abrupt halt in front of the sofa, her cheeks immediately turning a dark shade of red. A beat later she took a deep breath, grabbed the bag from the recliner and pretty much ran out of the room. I tried to shake the image of her in the tiniest top ever and low sweatpants from my head, but blinking only sent bolts of pain into my head again, so I closed my eyes and sighed.

"Here you go," Rose sat down on the edge of the sofa, handing me a glass and a pill, "some painkillers, too."

"Thanks."

The water soothed my aching throat and a few minutes later, the painkillers started kicking in slowly. My head was becoming clearer, which strangely only brought the image of Bella from earlier into my mind.

"Rose," I turned to her, "what happened last night?"

"Bella and I brought you home," she laughed to herself, "you treated us to a partial striptease and passed out in your bed."

"Is that all?" I breathed out, relieved.

"As far as I know," Rose kept laughing at my confused look, "Bella insisted to leave you a glass of water and painkillers, though, maybe you should ask her," my jaw dropped to the floor at the sight of Rosalie's raised eyebrow.

"What?" I managed to blurt out.

"Joking, Masen, just joking," she was in fits of laughter by now.

The laughter continued throughout dinner that I barely touched since I didn't trust my stomach with food just yet. Bella eventually joined us, too, but she kept her head down and I could clearly see the blush on her cheeks anytime our eyes met. So I spent most of dinner trying to remember what exactly had happened the night before and working up the courage to ask Bella.

But I wasn't even given the chance, as she darted out of the room immediately after we finished eating and I heard the door to her room slam from upstairs. Rose only shot me a confused look and shrugged her shoulders, then walked out of the room to make it to her evening meeting at the agency she worked for. Her knowledge of cars was really handy for the job she ended up with, running PR for several car shows and a few specific manufacturers. As she was walking out of the door, she almost bumped into Emmett, who'd just arrived from practice, but she made a point out of avoiding getting anywhere near him. Emmett shrugged his shoulders but I caught his lingering gaze at Rose's back and wondered briefly how he felt about sharing a house and most importantly, a bathroom with her.

"So, Edward," Jasper got my attention, "what was it with the love declarations last night?"

Everybody burst out in laughter as they told me how I went around hugging everyone and almost groping Emmett. My face was bright red by the time they were only half-way through the re-telling of what happened the previous night, but when I tried to stop them, I failed quite miserably.

"So what did you do to Bella?" Alice looked at me, eyebrow raised, curiosity written all over her face.

"Why?" I wasn't sure what Alice meant.

"I haven't seen her blush this much since high school," Jasper and Emmett nodded, both intrigued as well.

"I can't remember," I buried my face in my palms, "But Rose didn't mention anything too embarrassing."

Alice threw me a look and I knew that she'd be trying to get some answers from Bella the moment I'd walk out of the door. I didn't linger then, just in case they'd decide to quiz me more and headed back home; a strange feeling telling me there was something going on that I couldn't quite understand.


	7. 06 Unplayed Piano

**AN 1: I don't own anything. Seriously. Even my two-year-old acts like she's her own person ;)**

**AN2: Sorry for taking so long to update, my life's been a bit mad (OK, totally crazy, considering I had a weekend when I met Peter Facinelli and Kellan Lutz *lol* yup, bragging, sorry ;)) and my internet has been even worse. But there's a treat tonight, since I have two chapters ready to post. So hope you enjoy.**

**AN 3: Special dedication to my awesomest of awesome Beta walking with a ghost and to Patent Peekaboo Poses for the encouraging reviews *hugs*  
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Un-played piano**

_Bella_

"Thanks, boss," I smiled at the editor-in-chief and walked out of his office to my desk.

My new assignment was written out on a sheet of paper in front of me and I played with the leaflet in my hands, a description of the club I was supposed to go to. It was a small café-style place, which had live music every night, mostly solo performers or small bands playing acoustic guitars, no big shows or noisy rock performances. Since it was fairly new and getting big hype, I was sent to write a review of the place, which would require at least one evening with live music. And that just happened to be that night, so I had very little time to read up on the place or to try and get a list of performers.

But I was glad that I wasn't going to be overlooked or only assigned stuff that no one else wanted to do. The boss knew I liked music, so despite a few people in the office expressing interest in doing the review, he said he'd let me have a shot. My hands flew to my phone to try and find someone to come with me, since I wasn't too keen on heading out on my own.

"Hello," Alice picked up the phone after several rings, breathless.

"Oh sorry, is it a bad time?" I blushed even through the phone.

"Nah, I was just over in the dark room, trying to get those photos from yesterday developed."

Alice's mission to make her show the best that the campus had ever seen involved roping Rosalie and Jasper into modelling her creations out in the backyard of our house. So now she was developing the photos by herself to enlarge them and have them ready for promotional leaflets. The girl was taking the project deadly serious, I had to say, I was just glad she'd stopped asking me to play dress-up.

"Ah, right," I laughed, "Listen, what are you doing tonight?"

"Tonight? I have the photos to finish, then I have to run down to the mall and find a dress for Jasper's new exhibition and I have to get my hair done and find him a new shirt while I'm in the shops…" the words came out at the speed of a machine gun and I sighed.

"I forgot about that," I grumbled, "Damn, I can't take Emmett."

"Can't take him to what?"

I explained my assignment to her and listened to her praise the place I was reviewing, telling me about a few of the musicians she'd seen there. Of course, I should have known Alice knew about the club, she was the one of our small group to always have the hot-spots figured before anyone else did. And that included the general public. She was always spot-on, too, knowing way ahead which places were going to be the next big thing.

"Do you know anyone who'd be able to come with me?" I asked, almost desperate.

"I'd suggest Edward, he's mad into that kind of stuff," I almost choked on the air flowing into my lungs, "but he can't tonight, because I already bugged him to go to the museum with us and he said he was busy."

"Oh it doesn't matter," I sighed, "I'm sure I'll be fine on my own."

"Do you want us to pick you up after?" Alice offered, "It's on our way home, anyway."

We agreed that I would call Alice when the performance was finished, which according to her would be about the same time the exhibition was supposed to be over. I was glad to know that I wouldn't end up stuck in a place I wasn't entirely familiar with, despite the fact that it was easy enough to call for a cab. But knowing my luck, I'd end up having to escape some sort of an emergency, like back in high school, when Alice almost regularly had to save me from a very persistent Mike Newton, who had a knack for showing up everywhere I went, especially if I went somewhere without the rest of the gang.

That wasn't going to happen tonight, that much was for sure. For one, Mike was in New York, at a very safe distance and then there was the comfort of remembering that in Senior Year, he had started dating someone who wasn't me. The relief showed on my face any time someone from Forks mentioned Jessica Stanley still being all gooey-eyed about him and all their plans for the future.

After hesitating in front of my wardrobe for a moment, I picked my favourite jeans and a top that Alice had suggested, got dressed and set out to find the café. Luckily for me, despite my useless sense if direction, I practically stumbled into the place, since my feet, as per usual got caught on the small step at the front door, which to my relief no one seemed to notice.

"Can I get you anything?" a friendly voice tore me out of my musings about the club's layout and menus.

"Just a Coke, thank you," I looked up and my jaw dropped, "Leah?"

"Bells!" the dark-haired girl laughed, "fancy seeing you here."

"What are you…? OK, never mind, stupid question," I laughed with her, "How have you been?"

Leah quickly told me that she'd moved to Seattle about a year ago, following her boyfriend, Jacob, who happened to be one of my distant cousins, whom I lived with when I first moved to Forks.

"Jake will be happy I ran into you," she smiled.

"Yeah, well, here's my number," I scribbled it down on a page from my notebook, "tell him to stop being a stranger, I've even heard Billy complaining."

We talked for another moment and caught up on each other's lives, since I haven't even heard from either of them since Leah left for university and Jacob transferred to a high school near her shortly after I moved to Forks permanently. While we were talking, I noticed that the café was filling up and Leah had to get back to work.

"What's the entertainment tonight?" I asked her before she left.

"Oh, we have a new piano player," she grinned, "he was here last week and besides being an awesome player, he's also absolutely gorgeous."

"Now, wouldn't Jacob just love to know that?" I teased her.

"Oh he knows. I think he actually knows the guy."

"Do you?"

But before she could answer, my eyes darted to the small stage on the side and I felt the blood drain from my face as I let my gaze slide over the very familiar figure approaching it. I vaguely heard Leah laugh and say something, but the words escaped me, my own voice suddenly vanishing.

Edward Masen. Out of all the people in the whole city, out of all nights, it had to be him playing. I never even knew he played the piano, let alone that he did it in public, though since Alice hadn't mentioned anything, I guessed that I wasn't the only one he kept this secret from. For a second I wondered what he'd think of me being here before I decided to keep my head down and not let him see me, because I wasn't really sure what I thought of the situation. The next time I lifted my head, the glass of Coke I ordered was in front of me and I blushed, realizing I was too busy staring onto the empty page of my notebook to notice Leah leaving it there.

"Ladies and gentlemen," Leah's voice ripped me out of my dreamland again, "tonight's special guest, Edward Masen," she pointed towards him and I slid lower into my chair, letting my hair cover my face as his gaze swept the room.

The first few notes of the piano sounded hesitant, like he wasn't sure which melody to play first, but the music soon filled the room, my eyes misting over at one of my favourite classical pieces, Debussy's _Claire De Lune_. I lifted my face to see Edward completely lost in the melody, his fingers flying over the keys of the piano, eyes closed and each note played perfectly. His obvious talent was so amazing; I wondered briefly why he didn't pursue a career in music. As the night went on, I found myself more and more lost in the music that Edward was playing, songs that I recognized from my own small collection of classical music, some that had famous composers but mostly a few songs that he didn't introduce and I didn't recognize.

I was just wondering if they were possibly his compositions when a quiet beep from my phone alerted me to Alice's arrival. Leah happened to be close by so I paid for the drinks I had, grabbed my coat and practically ran out of the door, noticing Edward still engrossed in the last notes of another one of the unrecognizable compositions. Jasper and Alice were right in front of the entrance, so I fell into the back seat, pretending to be taking notes just so they wouldn't question me. Once we got home, I quickly excused myself and vanished into my room, glad that Alice bought my explanation about the review being due the next day.

But the notebook stayed untouched on my desk as I was lying on the bed, suddenly way too tired to do anything. I knew my dreams were usually quite vivid and as so many times before, I was glad that no one would listen to me talk in my sleep.

My eyes shot open in the middle of the night and I sat up, staring at the wall in front of me, trying to make sense of the dream that woke me up. But no matter how I tried, the only thing I could remember was Edward's face and a soft smile on his lips as the last melody played over and over in my head, it's tones strangely soothing but also unnervingly familiar.

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	8. 07 Like a Dream

**AN: I don't own the characters. Or the names. Or anything. Seriously. ;)**

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Like a dream**

**_Edward_**

I was very confident that no one knew about my little forays into the world of music, which was exactly what I wanted. Rose of course knew I used to play piano and so did Alice, but both of them were convinced it was a thing of the past. They've both seen a few of my performances back in school, all parts of either school concerts or drama club shows which I helped with. But music stayed my constant companion through my university years; I just didn't tell anyone about it, choosing to play in small clubs and empty practice rooms instead. The list of my own compositions grew and I'd even managed to record a few of them with the help of the music students I met on my various gigs around town.

One of the discs I recorded was almost always playing in my room, especially when I was sleeping, since the tones of the piano were more soothing than anything else I'd ever tried. They helped me rest better than any sleeping pills could have and I needed the comfort lately with the overload of work in college. So I took to automatically switching the player on the moment my body hit the mattress, the volume so low I barely even noticed if I forgot to turn it off in the mornings.

"Rose!" I shouted at my cousin from across the street.

"Oh, hey Edward," she grinned at me, "we almost thought you weren't going to make it."

"Would I miss out on watching the Alice and Jazz show?"

"Hey!" Jasper glared at me, the pixie as per usual glued to his side.

Alice had called me the day before, having fairly convincing arguments for why I should risk not having one of my assignments finished on time and why I desperately needed to have a night out. Her words, not mine, though if anyone tortured me I would've admitted that she had a point. I hadn't gone out nearly as much as I wanted to, since between my gigs that made me the tiniest bit of money and my studies, I barely had time to breathe, let alone have fun.

"Is McCarthy inside already?" I asked, earning myself a hiss from Rose and a laugh from Jasper.

"Yeah, he's already hitting the shots," Alice rolled her eyes, "I think he's trying to get Bella more drunk than himself."

Bella was here? My heart fluttered without a warning but I didn't dare to stop and think what it meant. I didn't bother fighting Alice as she grabbed my hand and pulled me inside, straight to the bar and pretty much ripped the two shots Emmett held, handing me one of them with a challenging look in her face. Without as much as looking at anyone else, I threw the liquid into my mouth, vaguely noticing the familiar taste of tequila and I shuddered at the mild burn. Emmett's laugh made me turn around and my eyes found Bella, whose eyes were focused on our pixie friend, an eyebrow raised questioningly. But before I could figure out what their silent exchange was about, Emmett had a line of shots on the bar, one in front of each of us.

"Let's see how quick we can down these," he grinned, his watch in hand, "I'll start, then when mine's done, it's Bells, Edward, pixie… you get the drift."

Despite his obvious refusal to say Rose's name, nobody called him on it to keep the very untypical peace between them. As several times before, I caught Emmett's short glance at Rosalie, who seemed very interested in the contents of her glass. But the beep of the stopwatch tore me out of my musings and my eyes were glued to Bella as I was waiting for my cue to drink.

As the tequila ran down my throat and I knew Alice was busy drinking hers, I let my eyes glide over Bella's face and body, trying to stay unnoticed. She was wearing a very tight-fitting pair of jeans that raised my breathing a notch and a top that didn't cover much more than the one I've seen her wearing at the house. Her shoulders were covered with a light hoodie that was left open and looked like it was going to slide off any second. Emmett's whooping tore me out of my observations, but luckily, he was happy enough with the time, so we weren't subjected to another round. I wasn't entirely sure that I'd be able to handle shots at the same speed as him.

"Edward, come dance with me," Alice beamed and threw me her best pleading look, "Jasper's busy," she pouted her lips.

"Jasper's not glued to you?" I laughed teasingly, "Well, I need to take advantage of that, pixie."

"You're the only one who has decent dancing skills anyway," she said loud enough so that Jasper heard her, but he seemed to be in a deep conversation with Rose and didn't react.

"Let's go, Alice," my hand met hers and I whirled her around on the way to the dance floor.

We only had the chance to dance to one song before I was pushed out of the way by Jasper, who mumbled something about showing Alice his dancing skills. Not sure if their show would be something I could handle, I turned towards the bar, to find Emmett, but stop dead in my tracks. Rose and Em were sitting at the bar, throwing back shots and washing them down with lemonade, seemingly found a truce and a challenge going. As I averted my eyes from them, I saw Bella standing at the other side of the bar, an amused smirk in her face, and two shot glasses in front of her. The thought of alcohol seemed appealing enough, so I walked to her and before she could react, grabbed both glasses and poured them into my mouth without hesitation.

"Hey!" she tried to glare at me angrily, "those were mine."

"Well, they looked fairly abandoned," I shrugged my shoulders.

"You owe me a drink," Bella stated, "or rather, you owe me two drinks."

"Would you like tequila or something else," I smiled at her, mildly amused by her attempts at looking threatening.

"Tequila is fine," she shrugged, "I don't really care."

"Is Emmett on a mission to get everyone drunk?"

"I think so," Bella laughed with me, "he shouldn't do it with Rose, though."

"She won't kill him," I hesitated, "probably."

The bartender finally noticed my looks and I ordered two shots for each of us and a chaser, since my throat started burning a little. Bella's eyebrow shot up again and she teasingly asked me if I couldn't handle my drink. I didn't reply, my eyes glued to the hoodie that was sliding off her left shoulder, revealing her pale and soft-looking skin. Without thinking, my hand flew to her arm and I slid the fabric back up. My fingers lingered on Bella's shoulder a moment longer than necessary and I was surprised to see blood rushing into her face, giving her a blush that had nothing to do with the alcohol we were drinking.

"Would you like to dance?" I asked after I pulled my hand away and downed the two shots in front of me.

"I don't know…" Bella hesitated, "I can't… I don't really dance. I told you the other night."

"It's all in the leading," I smiled, encouraged by the drink.

Bella eyed me questioningly before she drank her shots and took the hand I was offering, and then she followed me to the dance floor. The music changed to a slower rhythm which I was partly grateful for and partly nervous about, noticing a little tension in Bella's eyes. But I refused to dwell on it, so I pulled her towards me and shivers ran down mine spine as her small hands touched my shoulders. Moments later, the song took over my mind and I slowly swayed in its rhythm, leading Bella, feeling her giving in to my movement. As we danced, I reached for her hand and led her into a spin, which made her lose balance a little, so I caught her with my other hand and pulled her closer to me. I heard her soft sigh as she leaned against my chest and seemed to be listening to my quickened breathing and heartbeat.

The room was spinning around me in a slightly disconcerting way, but I just held on to Bella and focused on the strawberry scent off her hair and the freesia hint from her perfume. My eyes closed to stop the spinning and I was sure that if I was standing alone, I'd be losing my balance, but holding Bella stopped that. I dared moving my hand to her lower back and discovered that her hoodie and top had slipped up and I almost felt electric sparks as my fingertips touched her bare skin.

"Edward," she whispered, barely loud enough to hear over the music and my eyes shot open.

She was looking at me with an expression I couldn't completely decipher, though her nervousness and confusion were written all over her face. I watched her tongue darting out and moistening her lips before she bit the bottom lip, a million thoughts obviously running through her mind. Without thinking any further or hesitating, I felt a pull I couldn't resist, so I bent down slightly and my lips met hers gently.

Then I opened my eyes and blinked a few times before I realized that I was in my apartment, in my bed, with no clothes anywhere near my body. My blanket looked like someone tucked it around me so it wouldn't slide off and the usually untouched side of the bed was crumpled, as if someone had been there earlier. But my brain refused to cooperate as I tried to recall the previous night. There was nothing but a vague memory of Bella's lips on mine which I wasn't even sure was more than a dream. I sighed and curled back under the covers, hoping to have another of the recently frequent dreams about her.


	9. 08 Break Me Down

**Break me down**

_Bella_

The two shots of tequila went down my throat quicker than ever, and I ignored the burn, but not because I was in a rush to get them out of the way. I was hoping that the alcohol would help my courage come out from its hiding place and stop my heart practically doing cartwheels in my chest.

"Would you like to dance?" he asked ever so casually and I almost fell of my feet.

"I don't know," I tried to think of an appropriate excuse, "I can't…" then it suddenly hit me, "I don't really dance. I told you the other night."

Edward looked unconvinced, though I was sure he, like everyone else, knew of my balance issues and coordination problems. While I wasn't going to spell it out for him, I hoped that my face would give away that I didn't really want to break his toes or cause him to fall. Even though deep down, my heart now decided to do a little dance, purely due to the thought of holding him close if a slow song should happen to start.

"It's all in the leading," he smiled and I was lost.

Somehow I managed to shoot him an unsure look, seeing that his balance wasn't the best ever after the shots he downed since he'd joined us. But after I emptied the glasses in front of me, his hand was already stretched out towards me, so I lifted mine to meet it and let him lead me to the dance floor. The moment we stopped, the music changed from a fast rhythm to my mild relief, which only lasted until Edward pulled me towards him. The song's lyrics seemed to explain perfectly how I felt in the moment and while we danced, I almost nodded along with them, agreeing with every word.

_Give me a moment here  
Just enough to catch my breath  
Something is happening here  
And it's scaring me to death  
You push me to the edge  
I wanna risk it all again  
For the first time in a long time  
I'm throwing caution to the wind  
_

_You can break me down  
If you wanna break me down  
Doesn't really matter  
How this crazy thing turns out  
'Cause you take me there  
While I lose myself  
Just for a moment  
If nothing else  
You can break me down  
If you wanna break me down_

I lifted my head and looked around for Alice, wondering if she asked for the song, even if it wasn't really her style of music. But she was on the other side of the dance floor, lost in Jasper's eyes, not paying attention to anything else, so I assumed she didn't even notice Edward and me dancing. My head turned to Edward and I was surprised to see his eyes closed as a soft smile curled his lips. I felt an almost magnetic pull to them, something I never experienced before. The memory of him playing piano in the café crossed my mind and I smiled to myself, feeling the butterflies swarm my insides all over again.

"Edward," I heard myself whisper and bit my lips, wondering if he could hear me at all.

Then he opened his eyes, turned to look at me and before I could do or say anything else, he bent down and his lips touched mine. Any fight that I thought I should put up was blown out of my mind by the kiss and I immediately responded, my lips curving around his. As the kiss deepened, I felt his tongue dart out at the same time as mine slid over his bottom lip, wiping my mind clean of anything beyond us.

"Come with me," he whispered into my ear when we finally came up for air.

He led me out of the club, only stopping at the bar to pick up our jackets and my bag, and then he headed straight for the door and into the first taxi in the queue across the street.

_Yeah, it's the strangest thing  
But it all makes perfect sense  
Funny how life falls in place  
When you tell her take a chance  
You push me to the edge  
I wanna risk it all again  
So take me where you want to  
I am willing to give in_

Edward's apartment was surprisingly close, though it could have been far for all I knew, since all I was paying attention to was him kissing me. As we got out of the car, I recognized the area of the town and noted with surprise how close to the café he lived, once again running my memories of his performance through my head. Before I could think clearly again, we were inside the apartment and I felt Edward's hands pulling me closer and softly stroking my back as he kissed me. Then his lips left mine and slowly slid down my neck, leaving a trail of electric sparks in their wake, sending shivers down my spine. We made it into his bedroom and I reached for the buttons on his shirt as he slid the jacket and hoodie off my shoulders, running his fingers over my skin. I let my eyes slide over his body before he lifted my arms to take off my top, stopping my blush and embarrassment by pulling me against him. As I felt our bodies touching, my brain switched off completely and I took a step back towards the bed, pulling him along with me until I fell down on top of it. Edward stopped himself from falling on top of me with his arms and rolled over to my side. Before I could say or do anything, he pulled me on top, I felt his hands slide over the top of my jeans, and his fingers sneak underneath the fabric.

"I want to feel you," he whispered into my ear as he fumbled with the button.

The jeans were soon thrown down on the floor and I didn't hesitate before I sat up and unbuttoned his khakis, kneeling up so he could raise his hips and help me pull them off. With nothing between us but underwear, I was extremely aware of how much I wanted him and I felt the moisture pool in my panties. He didn't give me time to worry about whether he'd notice anything. His fingers slid under the waistband of them and I shivered a little as he brushed his hands over my thighs on his way back up. I felt his hard-on stretching the fabric of his boxers and without thinking I let my hips grind against him, causing a moan escaping both our lips.

Moments later, his boxers were flying across the room and I let my fingers slide over every inch of his stomach and hips, smiling at his groans. He reached down to my hips and his thumbs ground into my thighs, moving ever so slowly to my core. I moaned as he reached my core and gasped when he slipped a finger to my entrance. I shot him an inquiring gaze and he pulled his hand away, reaching to open a drawer on his bedside table. It comforted me a little that the box of condoms he took out was unopened. I took the small packet out of his hand, ripped it open and gently slid the condom on, watching Edward as he bit his lip and tried to calm down.

Once I was done, I turned over on my side and pulled him on top of me, crashing my lips against his. My legs wrapped around his thighs and I felt him trying to hover above me so he wouldn't crush me. But I didn't care anymore; all I wanted was to feel him inside of me, to finally get a release from the tension I felt building since we started dancing. Finally, Edward let himself lower and entered me slowly, then pulled back out at the same speed.

My hips arched against him and my fingers dug into his back as I silently urged him to move faster. I moaned into his mouth at his next movement and he seemed to get the hint. His hips crashed into mine and his movements got faster and faster. I felt him rubbing against my clit with every movement, bringing me closer to ecstasy at the speed of light. A while later I exploded around him as my quiet moan disturbed the silence of the room. He kept moving as I was slowly coming back to reality and then I felt him tense and shiver as he hit his climax.

We lay there for a moment, tired, sleepy and spent, neither of us saying a word. Edward pulled his blanket over us and cradled me in his arms. Some time later, I felt his breath even out and I listened to it for a couple of minutes. I wasn't able to fall asleep, because my brain suddenly decided to catch up on everything that happened. It must have been hours, because I eventually noticed the light coming through the half-opened blinds.

Edward was sleeping so deeply that he barely moved as I slid out of the bed and got dressed. I tucked the blanket around him, softly kissed his forehead, and then I headed out into the kitchen to find my bag so I could call a cab. Before I headed out of the door, I left a glass of water and some painkillers at his bed, throwing the condom box inside the drawer and threw out the discarded one. Then I headed home, wondering if I'd be able to sneak in without a questioning from anyone at home that I definitely wasn't ready for.


	10. 09 You Did What?

**AN: Hey everyone, sorry for the delay in updating... plus this chapter is unedited as of now, so apologies for typos and anything, my Beta and me can't seem to find time to be online at the same time lately. Hope you enjoy it anyway and I promise I'll have the next one out there soon. **

**Disclaimer: Blah blah Stephenie Meyer owns all blah blah...  
**

**

* * *

You did what?**

_Alice_

Rose grumbled a quiet hello as I ran into her on the way to the kitchen. The bonus of being in the same house as Jasper was that I could stay in his room and no one would consider questioning it. He admitted to me last night that living with me was his primary reason for requesting a house this big and I fell in love with him all over again. I'd missed him every time he had to go on his work trips, but now we were together and nothing else mattered. Well, at least when it came to us, anyway. There was still the matter of getting Rosalie to see the light, or rather, finding a way to get her and Emmett over whatever grudges they held, so they could be happy. It was going to be much easier with Emmett, now that I caught a few of his lingering glances at Rose and the sadness in his eyes when she ignored him. Who knew Em had those feelings in him?

"Is there coffee?" Rose asked as she walked into the kitchen to join me.

"I've just made some," I smiled, "it should be another minute."

"Thanks," her voice was rough.

"Painkillers are in the top drawer," I handed a glass of water to her before she sat down, "would you like some breakfast?"

"I need some caffeine first."

I continued to make toast and scrambled egg, so I could bring it up to Jasper once he woke up. The boys overdid it a little bit last night with the tequila and I figured Emmett would eventually come downstairs, too, rummaging for food. My plan was to question him about Rose, but that wasn't going to happen if she was still in the room. It would just have to wait.

The sound of the front door opening quietly tore me out of my thoughts and I suddenly realized I never saw Bella leaving the club with us. I felt a miniscule amount of guilt for not making sure my best friend was OK, but it's happened before and neither of us ever started panicking until lunchtime.

"Bella?" I shouted across the sitting room and turned to a hiss from Rose, "Sorry," I whispered.

I heard a grumble and Bella's quiet cursing, but I was sure the smell of fresh coffee would lure her into the kitchen even though she obviously didn't want to talk. 'This is going to be interesting', I thought as I tried to figure out for myself where she could've been last night. She walked into the kitchen and slumped into a chair, throwing a look at the coffee machine and then me. I poured two cups of coffee, switched off the cooker and carried the cups to the girls.

"So, Miss Swan," I smirked, "Where were you last night?"

"Nowhere interesting," she scowled into the cup.

"Doesn't look like it," I got some support of Rose, "you're blushing like mad, you have sex hair," she pointed to the mess on Bella's head, "and that is not your hoodie."

I've never seen Bella blush as much as she did as her eyes darted down to a dark blue hoodie that was a few sizes too big for her. The expression in her face made it clear that she hadn't noticed that she was wearing someone else's clothes, so I took a proper look at the top, trying to get some clues. Bella put her cup down on the table and I noticed her hands shaking a little before my eyes shot to a small logo stitched onto the front pocket on the hoodie. My eyes shot wide open in shock and I had to close my mouth after my jaw dropped almost to the floor in shock.

"Bella," I whispered, "Is that… does that belong to who I think it belongs to?"

"What do you mean, Alice?" Bella pretended to look all innocent, but she wasn't fooling me.

"I know that logo," I pointed to the picture, drawing Rosalie's attention to it, "And I'm sure Rose does, too."

"Not just that," Rose got my attention and I saw a smirk in her face, "I've seen that hoodie before."

"It's just a hoodie," Bella shrugged, still trying to be nonchalant about it.

"Yeah, it would be," Rose was more composed than me, "if it wasn't my cousin's."

"Edward Masen?" I almost shouted, "Bella, where were you all night?"

"Duh, Alice, where do you think she was?" Rose's face changed a little as she put the puzzle pieces together.

"It's not any of your business where I spent my night," Bella composure wavered and an angry look shot at both Rose and me.

"He's my cousin, Bella," Rose frowned, "and he's our friend. So are you. It is our business."

"The hell it is," I watched the exchange between my friends, neither of them happy.

Bella's anger was easily placed, I knew how much she hated being questioned and I knew her well enough to also know that whatever had happened, she was still trying to figure it out. I couldn't put my finger on what bugged Rose, though, but I knew enough to expect an explanation. Rosalie wasn't one to mince her words or hold back when she had an opinion on something. That was why she refused to properly acknowledge Emmett these days, she'd said all she had on her mind way back in school and for her there was nothing left to talk about anymore. At least not to him, as I was about to find out.

"Bella, you should know better," Rose growled, "you saw what broken relationships do to people."

"You would know," Bella shot back.

"Yes, I do," Rosalie didn't even flinch, "things get ruined and it never works."

"Bella," I interrupted before it could get worse, "how did you end up wearing Edward's hoodie?"

"I must've grabbed the wrong one off the hook," she shrugged, "I wasn't exactly awake when I was leaving."

"So you were at his apartment all night?"

Bella nodded shyly and I raised my eyebrows at her.

"Nothing happened, Alice," she sighed, rolling her eyes, "we got drunk and I figured someone should bring Edward home. You were too busy getting drunk," she glared at Rose, "and your face was a bit occupied," I felt the warmth in my cheeks escalate.

"Yeah, nothing happened, right," Rose scowled back, "like we're going to believe that."

"You can believe what you want," Bella gave herself away with a crimson blush, "You will do that no matter what I say."

"I'm sorry, Bella," Rose's voice softened, "I just… I don't want you to do my mistakes."

"Which was a mistake then," Bella was still angry, but I only focused on her blush, "being with Emmett or breaking up with him?"

Rosalie's face turned to the cup of coffee in front of her and for a moment I wondered if she'd regretted the break up, but she didn't linger on her thoughts too long. But as I turned to a furiously blushing Bella, something finally dawned on me and my hand flew to my mouth.

"How did I not realize this straight away?" I gasped, "You slept with him!"

Bella's blush couldn't get any darker as she still pretended to look offended, but she knew she couldn't hide it from either of us. It was just lucky she'd be able to hide it from Em and Jazz, because they'd tease the hell out of her.

"Bella?" Rose whispered, "Just… please be careful."

The softness in her voice threw me off a little, I wasn't sure how to explain Rosalie being this concerned about anyone. I noticed a hint of regret in her face, but she rearranged her features so quick, I wondered if I'd only imagined it.

"It was a one off, it won't happen again," Bella was still frowning, "is that careful enough for you?"

"So you did…" I started, but Bella's angry look cut me off.

"It's not like he'd remember," she whispered, disappointment ringing through every word, "or that he'd want to…"

"Bella, do you like him?" I reached for her hand.

She blushed instead of replying and I looked at Rosalie, who didn't try to hide her surprise this time as her expression mirrored mine.

"Look, girls, we were both drunk last night," Bella sighed, "I'm fairly sure Edward didn't even realize he was with me. And he won't remember anything. I'd say he thought I was someone else anyway."

She stood up, gulped down the rest of her coffee and walked out of the kitchen, her shoulders a bit slumped. I shot a look at Rose and raised my eyebrow to convey my unspoken question, but she only shrugged, not able to make sense of this either. I got up to finish Jasper's breakfast and picked up the tray to bring it up to him. There was a talk I needed to have with Edward, but that would have to wait until I was sure what to ask him.


	11. 10 Blur

**Disclaimer:** Not mine. Never was. Never said it was. OK, the idea for the story is, but even that is probably not original. Characters belong to Stephenie Meyer, I'm just taking them on a holiday.

**AN:** Hi guys. Sorry for the posting delay, I was trying to wait until my Beta's real life stuff eases off, but I don't want to be delaying this any more... I'm taking offers for someone who'll Beta read :) Bribe? You'd get the chapters in early ;)

* * *

**Blur**

_Edward_

There were painkillers on my bedside table when I woke up, though once again, I had no idea how they got there. I wondered if Rose and Bella had to bring me home like the last time, but everything in my head was clouded by pain. The taste of tequila lingered in my mouth and I quickly reached for the glass of water to wash at least a little bit away. That was when I noticed the drawer being slightly open and reached to check if everything was still in place. My eyes fell on the little box inside, the lid open and the plastic wrapping missing.

I heard myself gasp quietly and took the box out to check the contents. My breathing quickened as my check confirmed what I thought, there was a condom missing. Yet I was alone in my bed and besides the creased covers, there was no other sign of anyone else being in the apartment. I racked my brain for more information about the previous night, but it only made the pain worse, so I gulped down the painkiller and dragged myself out of bed. My clothes were scattered over the floor and still smelt of cigarettes and alcohol, so I grabbed some clean ones from the wardrobe and headed for the shower.

The hot water seemed to make the headache fade a little and I definitely felt more human when I was sitting in my kitchen, sipping on coffee. There were still no memories from the night in my head, though, no matter how hard I tried to remember anything at all. At that point, I was sure that someone had been in the apartment with me and obviously something had happened, but I didn't know who that person was. I finished my coffee and went to get dressed, so that I could run over to Jasper's house and question him on the night's events. The only thing I hoped for was that I could avoid the pixie. Alice would most likely be way too chipper for my hangover and I didn't really want to share with her that I didn't remember sleeping with someone. Girls don't understand those things.

I grabbed a hoodie off my chair and stopped short of putting it on, noticing that it was definitely not mine. It was a few sizes too small and a girls' style on top. So whoever was here had left it behind. It smelt of a perfume that I seemed to recognize from somewhere, though I wasn't sure from where and I was sure I'd seen it before. I groaned in frustration and went to grab my hoodie. A while later, I gave up the search, wondering briefly if I'd thrown it into the laundry bag, but I was too tired to search more thoroughly, so I grabbed a different jumper and headed off.

"Edward," Emmett grumbled as he opened the front door.

"Hey," I nodded in response.

"Had a good night?" he smirked, pointing to my hair which I forgot to wash.

"Don't know," I sighed, "I can't remember a thing."

Emmett gave me a short version of the night up until the moment when his own memory failed him, which didn't help me much. It explained the tequila taste in my mouth when I woke up, because Emmett said he'd been getting shots for all of us. And knowing myself, even when he'd stopped I continued with the same drink.

"Hey Masen," Rosalie shot me a strangely angry look, "you're alive then."

"Whatever I did, Rose," I sighed, "I'm sorry."

"Whatever you did? You don't remember anything?" she frowned.

"Nothing, it's all just a blur," my eyes turned to the floor.

"Ah," I heard her sigh and then walk away.

Alice came bounding down the stairs before I could dwell on Rosalie's words and tone any further. She took one look at me and obviously decided that I didn't need noise in my ears at the moment. The next moment I was out in the garden, sitting on a bench next to Alice and being pierced by her gaze. She talked quietly, aware of my hurting head, but she stopped questioning after I explained my hopefully only temporary amnesia. That was when she filled me in on some parts of the night, but she still didn't shed any light on who I left with or who I was talking to that might have been the person who had been in my bed.

After that mildly useless but strangely not unpleasant conversation, we headed back into the house and found Emmett sitting at the games console in the sitting room. He invited me to join in and I didn't hesitate, feeling so frustrated that I wanted to hit something and the game would help me do that without getting me into trouble. We sat there, bashing the daylights out of whichever monsters on the screen as a familiar scent hit my nose. I turned to find Bella standing in the door, her cheeks a warm red, her eyes turning to the floor the moment I looked at her.

Then it dawned on me. The reason I remembered the hoodie so well, why the scent off it was so familiar and why the painkillers were on my table when I woke up. But I couldn't just ask her when Em was in the room, so I let my eyes drift back to the screen and tried to finish the level quickly so I could talk to her.

"Edward?" Alice came over and whispered over my shoulder, "Can you help me with something?"

"Not right now, I need to…"

"Please?" she shot me her best pleading look.

I figured I'd quickly help her with whatever it was and then I'd find a way to talk to Bella to put the puzzle of the previous night together. My mind kept drifting back to the opened condom box in the drawer and I felt the blood in my cheeks as I wondered what happened. It couldn't have been Bella I was with…

"You remembered something," Alice's look pierced through me after she closed the door on her room.

"Kind of," I sighed, "I think I have Bella's hoodie in my apartment."

"But you knew that before," Alice looked confused.

"I didn't realize it was hers," my cheeks felt hot, "something happened and…"

"What do you mean by that?"

Blushing furiously, I explained to her that I found a condom missing at my place and that someone had been there, but I still didn't know who it was for sure. But now that I recognized Bella's perfume, I just felt worse for not remembering.

"Edward?" Alice's voice made me look at her, "do you like Bella?"

"I don't know Alice," I sighed, "I'm so confused now. I mean, she's beautiful; she's always been smart and funny...."

"But…?"

"She probably doesn't like me," my eyes turned to the floor again; "She's never noticed me, even back in Forks."

Alice didn't say anything and I used that moment to try and sort out my thoughts, especially those that Alice's simple question revealed. I had to admit to myself that I did like Bella quite a lot, even if I didn't really know how much that was. She was one of the smartest and prettiest girls I knew. And looking back at my memories of high school, she always was, I just never paid enough attention to any girls back then. Part of me wished it had been her in my apartment last night, but another part wished for the opposite, because I didn't remember. I wanted to remember if it was Bella.

"Hey," Alice tore me from my thoughts, "Do you want to come out for lunch with us?"

"Not today, Al," I took a deep breath, "I need to do some stuff and… think."

Alice left me to my thoughts then and went to get the others out for lunch. I heard them walking up and down the stairs and then the only thing left in the house was complete silence. For a while, I paced in circles in Alice's room, then I walked out and headed to my apartment to get ready for the gig I had later. Playing tonight would help me sort out my thoughts, maybe it would help me figure out what the strange feeling was that I had any time I thought of Bella.

I hit the play button on my stereo and sighed again as the song began, because it brought Bella's face to my mind and that in turn made my stomach feel like it did when I saw her. I've written it so long ago, the night after Alice and Bella's graduation barbecue, the notes coming seemingly from nowhere. But now I'd always associate it with one face and one pair of brown eyes. And I'd most definitely play it again tonight, in the hope of remembering anything about the night I now realized I must've spent with Bella. My forehead fell down on my table as I sat down and the frustration was overwhelming. As the song kept playing, I slowly started remembering Bella's smiles, her scent and the soft kiss I didn't only dream after all.


	12. 11 Suddenly I See

**AN: Apologies for taking so long to update. Excuses coming right up: 1) still no Beta... volunteers? 2) work made me internet-less for daytime and a teething toddler makes evenings short 3) I'm just plain lazy. Did I say I was sorry? I'm also hitting a bit of a writer's block due to lack of time. But my new laptop seems to give me a little inspiration... that and the New Moon set photos!  
**

**Disclaimer: I own a copy of the Magic Roundabout DVD (currently playing after being a perfect sleeping pill) :D Do not own Twilight (except merchandise, though if anyone's offering Edward...), sadly, Edward Cullen is owned by one Stephenie Meyer along with the rest of the characters. I'm just renting them to do my bidding... when I'm not doing theirs. **

Enough babbling, here's the new chapter:

* * *

**Suddenly I see**

_Bella_

"Bella, get dressed," Alice yelled from the hallway, "We're going out."

My eyes opened and I tore myself out of the daydream I was in for the last few hours. A week had passed since my night with Edward and I was quite convinced that he didn't remember anything that happened. He'd been strangely quiet, though, but that wasn't so unusual for him, so I didn't grant it much significance. I figured he was just trying to remember what had happened, but only Rosalie and Alice knew anything, so I felt safe enough knowing he'd never know. It wasn't like he'd care much anyway, since he never seemed interested in me in the slightest, so it must have been the alcohol talking that night.

"Leave me alone, Alice," I grumbled.

That only made it worse for me, though, because when she'd heard me so unwilling to go anywhere, she immediately shot into my room, ignoring the 'Don't disturb' sign that I borrowed from Emmett. Without looking at me, she walked straight to my wardrobe and shook her head, unimpressed once again, then left the room. Before I could breathe out a sigh of relief, she was back with clothes that I didn't recognize, but that had the distinct style of her latest designs.

"There," she handed the pile over, "these will suit you. Blue has always looked good on you."

"Thanks, Alice, but…" I wanted to excuse my way out of the evening out.

"None of that, Bella, we're only going for a coffee," Alice smiled, "You haven't done anything but work for a week, you need a night out."

"Fine," my voice was weak.

She helped me get ready and I had to admit that the clothes she made me put on were really nice. Her collection would be a success, I was sure and I told her so, causing her to almost float in the air briefly. She was already dressed and all set to go, so we walked down to wait for the others. Jasper was getting the car and we heard Emmett and Rosalie noisily arguing about something in their shared bathroom. Surprisingly, the living arrangements haven't ended in murder or great body harm just yet, though we were woken up by shouting matches a good bit.

We finally managed to get into Emmett's new car, since he was the designated driver for the night, to his dismay, but he let Jasper drive us from the house. I wondered where we were going as I forgot to ask Alice earlier, but the answer was right in front of me soon enough.

"I read your review, Bella," Alice answered my unspoken question, "And I've been here with Jazz before, so I figured it's a good place to go."

I couldn't reply, my throat closed up the moment I saw the familiar building and I felt my cheeks turning red and hot. Alice didn't seem to notice my reaction and walked straight to the front door, beckoning the others to follow her. I hesitated briefly, and then told myself off for panicking. There was no reason to worry that he'd be here this particular night, playing. For all I knew, Alice had invited him to join us, which I could handle a lot easier, or at least I hoped I could. Leah waved at us from the bar and came over quickly to take our orders, laughing as we immediately told her not to give Em any alcohol. None of us felt like carrying him home and having to leave the car behind.

We chatted for a while and I kept my eyes on Emmett for most of the time, wondering what exactly his fleeting looks at Rose meant. There was regret, pain and a small amount of longing in his face whenever he looked at her and at least once I caught Alice noticing the glance, so I knew by her scheming expression that I wasn't imagining anything.

"Ladies and gentlemen," Leah's voice made me look up on the stage and I froze.

I didn't hear anything else until the first tones of the piano drifted to our table across the room. Edward had his gaze locked on the keys, playing the song I still couldn't place properly, though this time it felt like I'd heard a recording of it somewhere. Alice shot me a shocked look, so I gulped the rest of my wine and motioned to Leah to bring me another one.

"Did you know he played?" Alice whispered so that only I could hear.

When I didn't reply, she gasped as she put meaning to my silence.

"Did you know he played _here_?" she amended her question.

"Yeah," I breathed out.

She turned away and I wondered if she was remembering parts of my review of this place, where I very deliberately didn't mention Edward's name, but mentioned his playing. If she did, she'd read way too much into it. But there was no way I could stop her, because my eyes were now glued to the stage and my mind was lost in the last few notes of the composition Edward was playing. I wanted to hear _Claire De Lune_ and as if he knew what I wished for, I smiled as I heard the transition into my favourite melody.

Edward took a break after a while and before I could tell Alice anything, she ran over to the little table on the side of the stage where I remembered him sitting on his breaks the last time. I tore my gaze away from him and gazed into my glass to calm down the butterflies in my stomach.

"Hey guys," I heard his voice at our table moments later, "I guess my secret's out then," he laughed softly.

Alice pulled up a chair for him and he joined us, immediately starting to chat to Rose about his gigs around town and explaining why he never told anyone. As I guessed, it was his little escape from everything, but what surprised me was Rose's mention of how he used to play back in Forks while we were still in high school and whenever he was over for visits. Unlike them, I wasn't around for the school performances they talked about, so I put on a face that showed complete surprise at the fact that he played at all. Alice seemed to have caught that because she never brought up my review or anything I wrote about his performance.

He had to go back to the stage then and I noticed that his playing was a bit less contemplative, the tunes a lot more for entertainment. It was like he wanted to keep his personal compositions from the gang, playing more to keep them cheerful and entertained. The contrast to the gig I witnessed was massive. I've seen him lost in his music, playing from the deepest and darkest corners of his mind then, whereas now he was playing what his personal audience wanted. Leah kept refilling my glass and I found myself getting more than tipsy, though I was still perfectly aware of everything around me, but a bit more attentive to Edward's every movement and face expression. The butterflies never calmed down anymore and I tried to figure out what it all meant.

"Bella," Alice turned to me, "Emmett wants to head home so he can get a drink," she laughed, "I asked Edward and he said he'll bring you home if you want to stay here longer," she left the question unspoken.

"Oh, okay," I sighed, not wanting to leave, though I knew I should.

"We'll see you at home then," she smiled and only then I noticed that Alice and Emmett were the last ones to leave.

After a brief moment of thinking what happened to Jasper and Rosalie, I figured they left to walk and clear their heads. Maybe Jazz decided to talk to Rose about Em, since I knew that he wanted to apologize for how the bedroom arrangements turned out. Shortly after they left, though, Edward sat down at the table and Leah brought him a fresh drink. He was already tipsy and the cocktail he had in front of him was not going to help with that. I finally found the courage to admit that I'd seen him playing before and told him about the review, which led to a conversation about my summer job and the articles I wrote so far.

"Do you want to go?" Edward asked as we both finished another drink, "I could do with some fresh air."

"Yeah," I started to stand up, hitting my knee on the corner of the table.

"Here, let me," he reached his hand out.

As we walked out of the café, I couldn't stop thinking about the fact that he was still holding my hand. His warm skin was perfectly aligned with mine, as if they belonged together. I kicked myself mentally for the soppy thoughts, but the nervousness that I felt didn't ease off even as we were walking down the street where his apartment was. If anything, the memories that the building he lived in brought up made my knees shake a little bit more.

"Bella," Edward stopped at his front door, "would you…"

I looked at him waiting for him to finish the thought, my eyes glued to his green eyes.

"Would you like a cup of coffee?"

Before I gave myself a chance to think it through, I nodded, my brain jumping to thoughts of the night I spent at his place and to memories of his lips on mine. I silently followed him into the house and up the stairs to his apartment; wondering if and secretly wishing that he would kiss me again.


	13. 12 No Regrets

**AN: **First of all, a huuuge THANK YOU to my new Beta: Patent Peekaboo Posies *hugs* She volunteered to put up with my whining about writer's block, my random comments on how the characters won't behave and do what I don't want them to do... well, no, she volunteered to Beta-read my story so you guys actually get to read it ;) Should've warned her more, I guess *lol*

Apologies for the delay with this, no excuses on hand besides lack of sleep.

**Disclaimer:** Characters are Mrs. Meyer's. I just have people to do and things to see for them ;)

I don't own the song that inspired the title for this chapter either:

_Tell me a story, where we all change, where we live our lives together, and not estranged..._

* * *

**No Regrets**

_Rosalie_

Jasper talked me into taking a walk home before the others left and I didn't mind so much, since it meant that I wouldn't be subjected to McCarthy's driving. There were so many things that he annoyed me with, but his driving was one of my biggest pet peeves. That's why I never even let him drive me anywhere back in Forks. It was easy to find an excuse when I had my own car and refused to let anyone at all come anywhere near it… except for Emmett, but even then it was only the back seat…

I immediately stopped myself short of going to memories of when we dated and I focused instead on Bella's face still frozen in what to an outsider would seem like shock. But I saw the blush in her cheeks and the part of her expression that made it obvious that she was overanalyzing something. It wasn't hard to guess that her thoughts were taken over by my dearest cousin, who turned a little pale when he noticed her at our table. Something was going on there and I wasn't sure it was a wise idea.

"Rose," Jasper said quietly when we were a block away, "I'm sorry."

"What are you apologizing for?" I turned to him, clearing my mind for a moment.

"For landing you with Emmett to share the bathroom with," Jazz looked rueful.

"I'll live," I smirked, "it's not like he's in there so much anyway."

We walked another bit in silence and I remembered why I liked Jasper in the first place. He was the polar opposite to Alice – the contrast to her constant chatter, the quiet and contemplative part of their relationship. It was comfortable to just walk with him in silence and not have to engage in a conversation, especially when I didn't really feel like talking. My mind was drifting between my worries about whatever it was that was happening with Edward and Bella and all the memories that even just the mention of Emmett's name brought to life.

"Rosie?" Jazz got my attention again, "Can I ask you something?"

"Not like me saying no would stop you," I smiled at him, "but sure, go ahead."

"Does Emmett really annoy you that much?"

"That's a very Alice question," I rolled my eyes.

"I know, but I've been wondering." I raised my eyebrow at him.

"OK, so we both were wondering," he admitted.

"Yes and no," I sighed, "he's McCarthy, so he'll always be annoying," Jasper laughed quietly, "and no, because I'm so used to him."

"Do you ever regret…" he paused, obviously unsure how to word the question.

"Breaking up with him?" I finished his thought. He nodded.

"Again, yes and no," I stopped at a bench and sat down, "at the time, it was the only way. But now…"

"Do you wonder what could have been?"

"Sometimes I do," my voice was quiet.

I wouldn't let anyone else see me this vulnerable, especially not Emmett, but with Jasper, I knew he wasn't going to take advantage of this moment or anything I'd tell him. I was carefully picking my words, deciding how much I was willing to share and what I wanted to keep to myself for now, at least.

"I wonder if we could've worked things out eventually," I looked up, "but back then, I wasn't able to just stand there and watch us go downhill."

"What about now?"

"There's no point thinking about it," I shrugged, "he's over it, he's moved on."

"What about you, though?" Jasper's voice was quiet and caring.

"I still care about him," I sighed, "which is probably why he doesn't annoy me as much as he technically should," my laugh came out very unconvincing.

"Rose…" Jasper looked at me, then looked down on the ground like he wanted to say something but changed his mind.

"This all is why I'm worried about Edward and Bella," I decided to change the topic, "wherever they are heading, it might end badly."

"What do you mean?" Jasper looked confused.

"There's something going on there and…" I paused, "I don't know… I just don't want either of them to get hurt."

"Or for all of us to get involved," Jasper finished where I was heading.

"You've seen how bad it was after Em and me."

"It might not be like that, Rosie," Jasper reached for my hand.

"Edward is not known for his successful relationships. Remember Tanya?" I shuddered at the memory of the exchange student Edward was dating back in Forks.

"He was a kid then," Jasper laughed, "and she was… different."

"One way of putting it," a smile made its way into my face.

"What would you say?"

"Don't make me go there," I frowned again.

Tanya had been a strong and stubborn girl who steamrolled over Edward without any concern for him. She wanted him, because he wasn't the same as every other unattached guy in school. He wasn't interested in her to begin with and we all knew she wasn't his type. She'd tried to pretend to be Alice's and my best friend all through their short lived dating period, then badmouthed us the moment Edward came to his senses and broke up with her.

"Bella is not like that," Jasper smiled at me.

"I know that, but…"

"Rose, they will be fine," he squeezed my hand, "they're grown up enough to know what they're doing."

"I'm not so sure about the grown up part after…" I caught myself before saying anything I shouldn't.

"After what?" Jasper glared at me, "Rose, what happened?"

"Do you remember much of that night we went out after we moved in?"

Jasper nodded and his face was full of impatience and expectation. I knew I shouldn't be telling him, but I figured Alice would tell him eventually anyway, so I decided to not keep secrets from him.

"Bella came to Edward's with me," I smiled, "And I think something changed then."

"Like what? Did you leave her there alone with him?"

"No, Jazz, I didn't," Bella was the baby of the gang and I had to laugh a little at how protective Jazz and Em could be when it came to her. As I answered Jasper's question, I recalled that Bella was alone in Edward's room for the briefest of moments while I was calling the taxi. But I couldn't imagine anything happening in such a short time. Before Jasper could pick up on my musings, I rearranged my facial expressions so I wouldn't give anything away.

"What's this about then?"

"We went out again a few days after," Jasper's face froze, "And Bella didn't come home with us then."

"She…" his voice cracked, "I'm going to kill him," he said angrily.

"Calm down," this time I reached for his hand, "I don't think he remembers anything."

"That doesn't matter. I'll help him remember."

"Please don't. Bella would kill me if she knew I told you," I frowned, lost in my thoughts again.

Bella would be furious if she ever found out that I mentioned anything at all to Jasper, just like I would be angry if he told anyone a word of what I told him about Emmett. My mind immediately shot to thoughts of the day after we moved in when I walked into the bathroom and happened to run into Emmett taking a shower. He never saw me, but my eyes covered enough to recall his body was still as fit as it used to be back in high school when he had to have a certain built for football. The memory clouded my sight for a moment and I tried to push it out with some sort of annoyance Emmett said or did, but it didn't seem to work.

"Let's go home, Jasper," I sighed, getting up off the bench.

Jasper lifted himself off the bench too and we walked slowly through the almost deserted street, both of us lost in thought. As we approached the house, I felt Jasper's hand on my shoulder and I looked at him, seeing the questions written in his face.

"Are you going to talk to Bella?"

"I don't know," I sighed, "it might be better to leave them alone for now."

"They'd be great together, you know?"

I nodded, remembering how I thought Edward and Bella would've been the perfect couple immediately after I met her. I wanted my cousin to be happy and I was quite sure Bella had the potential to do that. But at the time, Edward was only focused on getting into UW and never noticed the new girl who seemed to have a crush on him, though she probably didn't realize she was crushing on him herself.

"We'll just have to hope they don't mess it up…" my voice broke at yet another thought, this time not a pleasant one.

I missed Emmett. Even though we now lived in the same house; it just wasn't the same.


	14. 13 Night To Remember

**Disclaimer: I own nothing. OK, this computer, technically, if we ignore the fact that my Mom paid for it. Partly. **

**AN: So Rosalie's POV wasn't the end of the world ;) Good, there might be more in the future. But now, on to the man himself. And I apologize for the wordiness of this chapter (=thinking a lot). It's Edward. He thinks. A lot.**

**AN2: A massive shout-out to my Beta Patent Peekaboo Poses, since she's being the awesomest Beta :D And everyone who reviewed, *hugs* and hope this is a chapter to your liking :P  
**

* * *

**A night to remember**

_Edward_

"Would you like a cup of coffee?" I deliberately slurred the words a little.

Bella threw me a mildly surprised glance, which I figured was supposed to mean that she didn't want to spend time with me and I should be able to see that. The thing was, I did guess that, but at that point I was beginning to need her company and I was going to take anything. Even just a few moments spent talking over a cup of coffee. I knew that if it sobered her up, she would probably be out of my apartment at the speed of light. My memory recalled the taste of her skin and the way her lips felt on mine; I shivered at the thought if never being able to taste that again. Then she nodded and my heart rate increased enough for me to stop and make sure I could breathe easily.

She admitted earlier that she saw me playing in the café before this night and I was shocked that I hadn't noticed her. Just before we left, I talked to Leah for a moment and she confirmed it to me, making me a little annoyed that I wasn't told about Bella's presence then. That meant that she'd heard my songs, including my own compositions, which I kept out of the play list once I found out about the whole gang being there. I wondered if she noticed. Once we walked to my door and inside, Bella sat down at the kitchen table, waiting for me to make the coffee. We kept quiet while I was busying myself with the coffee machine and I waited for her to bolt out of the door.

"Your playlist changed tonight," she answered my unspoken question.

"Yeah," I stared at the countertop, "Tonight's audience was different."

"You mean Emmett's lack of appreciation for classical music?" she laughed.

"Something like that, yes," I grinned, but I knew the smile didn't reach my eyes.

The truth was that I didn't want Alice to recognize any of the pieces and question me on them later. She of course knew those that I wrote back in high school, but she would have recognized my style too easily. And she would read way too much into some of the pieces, including things that were unconnected. I tore myself out of my reverie and motioned for Bella to walk over to the sofa in the living room.

She followed me slowly and I felt her eyes piercing through me, even though I couldn't see her. Once I sat down, I pointed to the place next to me and set the coffee cups on the small table next to me. Bella turned to sit down and stumbled over the edge of the rug at the sofa. She tried to regain her balance but failed and fell straight onto my lap. I wrapped my arms around her and before she could get up, I moved towards her and my lips crashed into hers hungrily. To my surprise, she didn't pull away and I felt her returning the kiss just as fervently. My hands slid onto her waist and I felt the soft skin just above her jeans. I was fairly sure that her clothes had been chosen by Alice, knowing that Bella's style usually covered her curves a lot more. In my mind, I sent a thank you to the little pixie and allowed my hands to wander further up, sliding under Bella's top.

We kissed for a while and I felt Bella's hands run through my hair, tugging on it gently as she shifted her weight to be more comfortable. She settled on my lap and instead of the reaction I expected, she poked her tongue out and let it run over my lips, making me groan quietly. Again, instead of making her pull away, it only seemed to encourage her to be braver and her fingers moved down to my neck, tracing the muscles there. The tips of her fingers were cool and the difference in temperature sent shivers through my body, ending down in my groin. I felt myself get harder and wondered briefly if she'd notice and if that would be the reason for her to move away.

Bella let her hips grind into me gently, causing another groan to escape my lips into her mouth and I gripped her waist firmly, trying to stop my hips from moving against her. I needed her closer and I wanted to rip the clothes off her, but I was sure she wouldn't like them getting torn, so instead, I moved her so her legs were now around my waist. Her hips moved down onto me again and the friction against my groin was driving me crazy, so I wrapped one of my hands around her waist and pushed myself off the sofa with the other one. With her legs around me and her lips still on mine, we made our way into my bedroom and I gently laid her down on the bed, freeing my hands.

Her skin was covered in goose bumps everywhere I stroke my fingers, marveling at the sensation of her softness under my fingertips. I calmed myself down enough to gently undo the buttons of her blouse, revealing that she had no bra under the flimsy garment. Her nipples were begging me for attention, so I ran my thumb over one of them, causing Bella to arch into my hand and close her eyes. I brought my lips down to her chest and slid my tongue over the little nubs, watching her reaction. Before long, my hand snaked down to her jeans and they slid off easily, leaving her in nothing but a tiny G-String that matched her top.

Bella's hands busied themselves with the buttons on my shirt and she practically threw it off while I still caressed her breasts and stomach. She pulled me down on top of her and the feeling of our naked skin rubbing together almost made me lose control. I helped her get my jeans off and without me noticing, she managed to remove my boxers at the same time. My member rubbed against her still covered core and she pushed her hips into mine. I felt her arm move towards the night stand and reach for the drawer, so I helped her open it. But instead of allowing me to put the condom on, she pushed me off her and motioned for me to roll over on my back.

I was at her mercy now as I felt her lips make a trail of kisses down my chest and towards my erection. My eyelids closed and I tried to stop myself from arching my hips into her face too hard. I felt my member being enveloped by the warmth of her mouth and I groaned loudly, barely able to control myself as she sucked on me. But just before I lost control completely, she felt me tense up and her lips moved away, her hands replacing them as she pulled the condom on. The next thing I felt was her sliding up my body and she kissed me, letting me taste myself on her mouth. As my hands met her hips, I noticed that her panties were missing, making me realize that she took them off at some point that I wasn't aware of.

Without a warning, she lowered herself down onto me quicker than I expected and my hips reacted by grinding into her. She stayed still for a moment, and then started moving up and down, squeezing my erection with her core. I grabbed onto her waist and pulled her down to me so I could kiss her again. Her moans vibrated into my mouth and I could feel her getting closer to ecstasy. Though I wanted to last a little bit longer than her, my self-control was so thin that all it took was one more squeeze of her muscles and I groaned one more time as I spilled into her. Knowing she hadn't come yet, I kissed her again, pushing deeper into her before my member went soft again. A few more strokes later Bella lifted herself up off my chest and her back arched, allowing me access to her clit. My fingers moved to stroke it and she held on to the sheets as I watched her moan loudly as she tightened around me and reached her orgasm.

She collapsed on top of me and I wrapped my arms around her, letting her head rest on my chest. A while later I felt her breath even out and smiled at her sleeping frame. She slid off me so I got rid of the condom and snuggled back into the bed, wrapping my arm around her before I drifted off to sleep, too.

I didn't know how long we were asleep before soft mumbles ripped me out of the dreams in which I relived the evening. Bella was walking around the room erratically, but quietly, whispering to herself. I didn't open my eyes properly, wondering if I should let her know I was awake, but deciding against it in the end. She grabbed her clothes and threw them on, her cheeks flaring up with a blush that I could see even in the dim light of the night lamp. It must have been still dark outside, because the blinds were up but there was no light coming inside.

"Stupid, stupid Bella," I heard her whisper to herself, still unable to make out any of the other words.

She walked out of the room quickly and I finally opened my eyes, sighing resignedly. This was the moment I dreaded, the moment she'd walk out of my apartment and at the same time out of my life. I wanted to run after her, but I was frozen in my bed, incapable of coherent thoughts, let alone of words coming out of my mouth. I heard her fumbling around the kitchen and then her steps came a little closer again, so as the coward that I was, I closed my eyes again and turned to my side so she would think I was asleep.

She pulled the blanket over my shoulder and I heard the quiet sound of something being put on the night stand. I wanted to open my eyes and look at her one more time, because I guessed that I wouldn't get to see Bella for a while, but I chickened out. So I listened to her steps as she walked out of the room and closed the door behind her and waited for a while before my hand found the remote control for my stereo. The soft music filled the room and I kept my eyes closed, trying to drift back to sleep.

An hour later, I was still awake, tossing and turning in my bed and unable to find the same comfort I felt when Bella was next to me.

"Idiot," I grumbled at myself, "such an idiot."

Grudgingly, I dragged myself from underneath the covers and decided to go find someone to help me figure out what was going on. I threw some clothes on and splashed a little bit of water into my face, trying to look half decent, but not willing to wash off Bella's scent off my skin. When I walked back into my room, I found a glass of water and painkillers on the night stand. Bella must have left them there; I realized and grabbed my cell to dial a well-known number.

"I need to talk," I breathed out into the phone.

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_AN3: Apparently I've been nominated for the Indie Twific Awards!! Thank you to my Beta for nominating me (check out two of her fics which are also being nominated ;)) And well, awesome :D _


	15. 14 Do You Realize

**Disclaimer: I own... a bunch of books, CDs and DVDs which would all be sold to pay off my debts. Even my two-year-old owns herself already ;) Characters are Ms. Meyer's, I'm just borrowing.**

**AN: OK, first of all, apologies for the delay. There's about a mile long list of reasons, none of which would sound as more than an excuse, so I'm just gonna say sorry for not posting this earlier. My awesome Beta _Patent Peekaboo Posies_ has delivered this ages ago, so the blame is entirely mine.**

**Without further chatter... here's Edward's phone friend:  
**

* * *

**Do you realize**

_Emmett_

"Emmett? Are you there?" Edward's voice sounded raspy and slightly panicky.

"Yeah, sure," I answered him.

"Can you call over to my place?" he seemed a little bit sleepy.

"Give me the address," I listened as he gave me directions and finished the call quickly.

Typically, I ran into Alice on the way down the stairs.

"Where are you off to this early?" she looked at me curiously.

"Just getting some fresh air," I lied smoothly, "my head's killing me."

Somehow, I knew Edward didn't want anyone else to know about this chat that he wanted to have. Luckily, Alice bought my story without her usual questioning and I wondered if it was only because she didn't feel the best herself or if her mind was elsewhere. Judging by her happy smile as she bounced up the stairs, she was completely focused on Jasper. They were lucky: no issues, no complications, nothing standing in their way to happiness. Sometimes I was jealous of them, but mostly I was just glad that a part of our gang was stable enough to hold the rest of us together.

Edward was standing next to his window and pressed the buzzer to let me in before I could ring the doorbell. When I got to his door, he had it already open and handed me a cup of coffee as if he knew I would've asked for it anyway. Then again, his head must've been just as bad as mine and he was always surprisingly prepared for hangovers. Lord knows we fought our way through enough of them in the past.

"So what's the emergency?" I looked at him questioningly.

His face dropped and I could see his cheeks turning red and his lips pursing slightly. Edward blushing, now that was a new one, this guy never did anything that would've made him feel embarrassed. Or even if he did, he wouldn't let anyone see the harbingers of the humiliation.

"Edward?" I asked, lifting my eyes to meet his.

"OK," he finally looked me in the eyes cautiously, "you have to promise you won't kill me, though."

"Why would I..?" I stopped as a warning sign flashed in front of my eyes, "Does this have to do with Rose?"

"No," he almost laughed and I breathed a quick sigh of relief, hoping he wouldn't notice it, "Though it's interesting that it would worry you."

"What is it then?" I was quick to change the focus back on him.

My eyes followed him as he paced around the room for a while, not saying anything and obviously preoccupied. Finally, he slumped into a chair and breathed out loudly, rubbing his temples with his fingers roughly.

"Edward, what's going on?" I sat down across the room, "you're making me nervous."

"Sorry, Em," he looked up at me, his eyes darting around the room.

"What did you do?"

"Promise you'll listen to me first," he pleaded with me, "don't jump to conclusions."

"I'll try," my lips curled up, but fell straight down, seeing his face.

"It's about…" he gulped, "it's Bella."

I heard myself gasp and naturally, my brain immediately started churning out various different scenarios, none of which I was particularly impressed with. But before I could throw a number of curse words and insults at Edward I met his gaze and froze on the spot. It was obvious that he was well aware of my train of thought and probably could pick every single idea out of my head. He knew me as well as I knew him and he could read me better than anyone else. At the same time, his face was looking like the face of a martyr, if I've ever seen one. Not that I had really seen one…

"No jumping to conclusions, remember?" Edward whispered softly, his voice raspy.

"Talk, then, before I think any more," I sighed.

"Well…" the words seemed to escape him, "she came home with me last night."

For a second, I saw red again, but I allowed myself to calm down and let him finish what he was going to say.

"It wasn't the first time, either," his eyes met mine briefly, checking if I was still listening, "I won't go into details, but… things happened."

For once I didn't feel like joking about this, since Edward seemed so worried and tortured by whatever was on his mind.

"Edward," I waited until he looked at me and suddenly I understood his anguish.

The poor guy was head over heels in love with Bella and it wasn't a new development either, by the looks of it. Before now, though, I guessed that he hadn't been aware of his feelings for her and now he was in a bit of a shock.

"Emmett, I don't know what's happening…" he mumbled and my jaw dropped to the floor.

I was wrong, it seemed, and Edward obviously analyzed the situation to death and couldn't see the forest for the trees. How he could not be aware of his feelings was beyond me, since it was clearly written in his face. Alice must've noticed at least, but I couldn't just pick up the phone and call her now, as tempting as it was.

"Edward," I waited until he looked at me, "what do you think is happening?"

His face was blank and I felt like slapping him so that he'd wake up and smell the roses… I stopped my train of thought before images of Rosalie flooded my head. The only one more oblivious from our gang was the one Edward was so oblivious about.

"Did Bella say anything?" I suddenly wondered.

"No, she… she left, thinking I was still asleep," Edward sighed, "I heard her calling herself silly, so…"

"So you assumed she regretted anything that happened?" I almost snorted.

"What else?"

"It couldn't possibly be that she might like you back, could it?"

"Emmett, this is not a joke!" he looked at me, obviously annoyed with the smirk in my face.

"I'm not joking," I met his eyes, "women are weird that way. What if she does like you back, but assumes it was just a one night fling for you?"

"It wasn't just…"

"I know that, but Bella doesn't."

"No, I mean…"

"This is not the first time?" my eyes popped at him and I felt the urge to strangle him for a moment.

"The night you were making us all drink shots…" Edward threw me an accusing look, like it was my fault, "I didn't remember at first, but Alice…"

"Alice knows everything, as usual," I rolled my eyes.

We sat in silence for a while and I tried to figure out what to tell Edward besides hammering into him how obviously he was in love with Bella. But I knew that subtle worked with him a lot better, since it didn't result in immediate denial of his feelings. It used to be so much easier when Rose and me…

"Emmett?" Edward tore me out of my small reverie just in time.

"Yeah?"

"Rose and you…" I groaned, "sorry, I just…"

"What do you want to know?"

"Do you still love her?"

I didn't expect a question this blunt so before I could control me reactions, I nodded and felt my cheeks going bright red. Rosalie used to be my world, my angel… until I messed up and left my priorities all wrong.

"Why don't you tell her?"

"She made her decision, Edward," I sighed, "she's making that clear every day we run into each other."

"What if you're wrong?"

"What if you are?" I retaliated in self-defence, "What if Bella likes you, too?"

We both stared out of the window contemplating that possibility. I heard Edward stand up and pace the room a few times, then he fell back into the chair and his frustrated groan echoed across the room. But my mind was no longer on him and Bella. Once the first image of Rosalie jumped into my mind, there was no stopping the memories and pictures grabbing my attention.

"Em?" Edward stood up and paced the room again, "What do you think I should do?"

His eyes were filled with anguish and I could see his every thought in his face, from the wondering about Bella's feelings, through the realisation about his own, to the possible scenarios that would answer the question he'd just asked.

"I don't know," I whispered, my voice echoing the same confusion, "I just… don't know."


	16. 15 Remember to Forget

**AN: I'm so so so so sorry, everyone. The delayed update is entirely on me this time, my dear Beta _Patent Pekaboo Poses_ sent this t me ages ago & I didn't get around to posting :( I'll try to not keep it this long the next time, honest. **

**Disclaimer: I own nothing, these days not even my own time ;) And especially not Edward :(  
**

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**Remember to forget**

_Bella_

I tiptoed out of Edward's room and into the kitchen, leaning against the fridge door, trying to cool my forehead a little. My face was flushed and I knew my cheeks were bright crimson from the heat flooding my body and the reaction to the memories flashing through my mind like a 3-D movie. Edward's lips on mine, his hands caressing my skin, his fingers tracing patterns on my chest, his eyes drilling holes into my soul were making me feel every little thing that I felt in the hours leading up to now. And where was I now? Standing in his kitchen, dressed in nothing but a blanket that I managed to grab from a chair next to the bed he was still peacefully sleeping in. The sky was still almost black and as I looked out of the window, I couldn't see anyone on the street below.

Grabbing a glass from the cupboard in front of me, I filled it up with water and let it cool me down a little from inside. It washed away the aftertaste of the alcohol that still lingered on my taste buds, making me feel slightly nauseous. I grabbed the box of painkillers from my purse, which I'd left in the kitchen earlier and swallowed two, hoping that they would work quickly.

I filled up another glass with water and brought my purse into Edward's room so I could leave them out for him before I left. My clothes were strewn across the room, entangled with his and I grumbled to myself as once again my mind forced the images of how they got there in front of my eyes.

"Stupid, stupid Bella," I chastised myself quietly; throwing a quick glance at the bed to make sure Edward was still asleep.

I saw him turning to his side, sighing deeply in his sleep and the blanket slid off his shoulder, so I walked to the bed, pulling the cover over him and placed the glass on the bedside table. Before I gave in to the urge of climbing back in next to him so that I could wake up in his arms later, I forced myself to step away from the bed.

"Why did you go along so eagerly again, Bella?" I mumbled in a hushed voice, quite sure he wouldn't hear me, "Never mind the fact that he's temptation personified, or the fact that the taste of his lips is better than anything else you ever came across. Bella, you're an idiot. He doesn't like you the way you like him… wait, what?"

I stopped and closed my eyes for a moment. Did I just admit to myself that I might possibly have feelings for Edward? It would certainly explain why I'd want to jump at any chance to be with him in any way available. But it couldn't be true, there's no way I could like Edward as more than a friend, we've been around each other so long, I would've noticed him way before now.

Oh damn.

My palm found my face and I almost ran out of the room back into the kitchen and then straight out the door once I checked that I was fully dressed. As I was walking down the stairs from Edward's door, I found my cell phone and called a cab so I wouldn't walk around the town alone. Even if the idea of clearing my head was becoming more tempting with each step I took.

The drive home was quick, I felt like a fog was clouding my mind, and there was only one thing that I could see clearly.

I was in love with Edward Masen.

Damn again.

No lights were on as I reached the front door, so I quickly ran up the stairs and locked my bedroom door once I walked in. There was no way I could handle anyone talking to me right now, especially not Alice, who was most likely home already.

I'd just have to forget all the memories of Edward, erase every kiss, every touch of his hand… I groaned quietly and pushed the door to my balcony open. The cool air sent shivers down my spine and I sat there for a while, trying to clear my head and replace every thought of Edward with something that completely unconnected to him.

As the sun started rising, I forced myself back into my room and crawled into my bed, only discarding the necessary layers of clothing to be able to sleep. The last thought that invaded my mind before I fell asleep was that I could smell Edward's cologne entering my nose.

A few hours later my bedroom door shook as a result of someone banging on it furiously. I groaned and dragged myself out of bed to unlock it and I only just managed to step back as Alice swung the door open and bounced into my room. Yes, literally bounced inside and I briefly wondered how many coffees she had that morning as I could barely follow her movements.

"Morning, sunshine!" her voice sounded more cheerful than usual, which was a shock in itself.

"Go away, Alice," I threw her a tired and annoyed look.

"So how was your night?" she completely ignored me and looked at me expectantly.

I decided to ignore her back and walked to my wardrobe to find something to throw on so I could go downstairs and grab a coffee and a few painkillers, since my head started pounding in reaction to the volume of Alice's voice.

"Did Edward walk you home? I never heard you coming in, was it very late? Or very early?" Alice's eyebrows shot up at the last question and I rolled my eyes in response.

"I don't know what you're talking about, Brandon."

"Ah, last names… what are you hiding, Bella?"

"Nothing," I knew my blush was giving me away, but I wasn't going to discuss details with her.

I especially wasn't going to share details that I was trying so hard to forget, even though it obviously wasn't working too well. Just before Alice almost broke my door down, my brain was occupied with a very detailed dream involving Edward, me, and a meadow that I remembered from Forks. I wondered briefly how my mind found that little memory so deeply hidden that had anyone asked me about it a few weeks ago, I would've replied with a blank stare.

It was a small patch of grass not far from Rosalie's home, which I managed to discover the day of the graduation barbecue. I found Edward there, just lying on the grass and listening to some music. That was when I came to have his UW hoodie in my possession, since we stayed there long enough for the sun to go down and when he noticed I was getting cold, he took it off and offered it to me.

"Earth to Bella," Alice laughed at my reverie, "where did your mind go?"

"Nowhere," I felt my cheeks get warmer again.

"Honey, you should know by now that you have no poker face," Alice chuckled, "What is on your mind?"

I refused to look at her and pretended to rummage through my wardrobe, like I suddenly cared what I was going to wear while I was inside the house. Then again, the last time I just ran down in barely anything, Edward was sitting on our sofa and… no, I wasn't going to allow my mind to revisit that day.

"Bella?" Alice's voice softened, "Are you alright?"

My eyes closed and I leaned my forehead against the wardrobe door, sighing deeply. I should have no problem talking to Alice, but the idea of actually saying how I felt out loud would make it real. I felt my best friend's arms wrap around my shoulders as she softly pulled me away from where I was and led me to the bed. My eyes finally found hers and I could see that she read everything that I wasn't able to say from my face expressions. "Oh, Bells," she smiled, "you act like it's the end of the world."

"Alice, I…" my throat closed again and I gulped back the urge to cry.

"You like him a lot, don't you?" Alice grabbed my hand and watched me nod, "and you think he doesn't like you."

I stared at her in amazement as she seemed to pick thoughts out of my mind as if she'd turned into a mind reader overnight.

"It will work out, you know?" she smiled and my mouth opened to say something, "Bella, you worry too much. I'm sure Edward likes you back."

"Alice, how…" my voice kept failing me.

"Trust me," she laughed, "I know you two will be like Jasper and me soon."

The only thing I could do was to keep staring at her, my mouth still open in shock and a while later I shook my head, not daring to trust Alice's guesses.

"Now come on," she dragged me off the bed, "I'd say you're in bad need of a strong cup of coffee. And then we're going shopping."

I groaned and watched her roll her eyes as she threw my clothes out of the wardrobe again.

"Put this on," she handed me a few pieces of clothing, "we have a matchmaking mission to plan."


	17. 16 Mix and Match

**AN: I am so so so so sorry for this late update! Apparently, I am to blame my Beta, Patent Peekaboo Poses for the delay, but she's not the only one at fault. I have taken longer to post this because of a) my shitty laptop and b) real life. It does not help that I have a mild case of writer's block which will hopefully get back from playing with Edward very soon ;)**

Disclaimer: I own nothing. Well, unless you count a lot of Edward fantasies. And a few Jasper ones LOL.

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**Mix and match**

Rosalie

I didn't know why Alice insisted with such force that we all wake up at the break of dawn, but I guessed it had something to do with Bella sneaking in the house after spending the night at Edward's again. Sure, Bella thought she was being meticulously inconspicuous and definitely wasn't aware of Emmett and Edward having talked about what now was a ridiculously obvious crush that my cousin had developed on her. Like I wouldn't hear her balcony opening in the middle of the night, even if I hadn't seen her walking through the door as I was in the back yard getting my box of tools to tune Jasper's car engine before he went to work. I hated not having things ready the night before I worked on something and I had forgotten before we'd gone out.

That was a little lucky, of course, but I'd still have figured out everything from Bella's bright red cheeks and the refusal to look me straight in the eyes. And the avoidance wasn't only limited to me but literally every human being in her vicinity. I wasn't above placing a bet that if we had a pet, she wouldn't even look the animal in the eyes.

"Thanks, Rosie," Jasper hugged me as I handed him the car keys.

"No problem," I laughed, "it keeps me on my toes and your car's good practice for the next car show."

"I'll pass that on to my boss. He's quite delighted I'm not getting it fixed anywhere else, apparently the prices in Seattle are daylight robbery."

"I can't say I disagree with him," I felt a smirk play upon my lips.

"Take it easy on Bella today," Jasper's hand rested on my shoulder, "the girl's in love, but I'm not sure she knows it yet."

"I know," my lungs let out the air they were holding, "she doesn't know about Edward, either."

"You mean the Emmett thing?"

I nodded and as if on cue a sheepish looking Emmett appeared in the hallway, just back from his visit to Edward's place. He didn't look at me, just skulked straight upstairs towards his room and I sighed again, not knowing what to think.

While I tried to occupy my mind with the reasons for Emmett's visit to Edward's apartment that very obviously had something to do with Bella's late night return home, my brain kept jumping to the images of Emmett in the shower. I groaned at the picture in my head and stomped off to my room, feeling just like I used to back in high school, just after I broke up with Em.

"Rosie?" Alice peeked into the room with a sheepish smile.

"What's up, pixie?"

"Do you feel like going to the mall today?" she smiled, knowing very well I never declined an offer for a shopping trip.

"Sure, what's the occasion?" I saw past her innocent look.

"I need to get Bella out," she laughed, obviously not sorry that I caught on to her having a plan, "she's trying to avoid everyone and we need to talk to her."

"We do?"

"This thing with her and Edward needs to stop..."

"Definitely," I rolled my eyes, "it's only going to end in tears."

"That's not what I meant, Rose," Alice shut the door behind her and sat down on my bed.

"What is it then?"

"The girl's head over heels," Alice sighed, "and so is Edward."

"Oh..." I realized I didn't pay enough attention to my cousin's feelings, but I knew I could trust Alice's observations, "let me guess, Bella won't believe he likes her unless he proposes or something."

Alice laughed, but nodded her head and I immediately knew she had a plan.

But somehow, whilst I advocated the idea of Bella and Edward together, I wondered what exactly the pixie's plan would entail.

"OK, so what exactly is the battle plan?"

"I don't know yet," Alice sighed, "It's not like I can get him to open up, but…"

I ignored her pointed look in my direction, because I already knew what she was thinking. Of course, under the pretense of family bonding, she would get me to talk to Edward and try to make him admit his feelings to Bella. But I found her overly enthusiastic, since Edward always had a tendency to bottle things up more than anyone else I knew. Sure, he over-analyzed everything including the amount of grains in his morning coffee, but his own feelings were something he didn't ever open his mouth about.

"Alice," I sighed, "I can get him to open up as much as I can get Emmett to clean the shower after himself."

Alice giggled and rolled her eyes, having been witness to Emmett's hygienic habits way too many times to disagree.

"We'll think of something."

With that, she went to get everyone gathered for the shopping trip and I decided to take a quick shower, before we headed out, since I expected shopping with Alice to be an all-day experience. But as I even looked at the shower, the picture of Emmett took over my head again and I sighed.

He'd improved with age, I had to admit that, but that wasn't a direction I was willing for my thoughts to take. That would mean admitting that…

"Rose!"

Alice's voice shook me out of my reverie just in time, stopping me from thoughts I tried to push away ever since we left high school. I shook the images out of my head and ran down the stairs to join Alice and Bella in Emmett's car. For once, I didn't feel like nagging him about his beloved Jeep, which was met with a raised eyebrow on Alice's face. Bella never noticed, too lost in her own mind.

We attacked the shops with a vengeance, Alice burning up her credit card with stuff for herself and for Bella and we even convinced Emmett to leave the gaming arcade where he was hiding most of the time for lunch. He offered to share his dessert with me and I took the olive branch quite gladly, sneaking little bites of the sundae in front of me. I was sick of us fighting or being so cold to each other, if I was honest with myself. We'd been so good back in high school and I never thought of anyone else the way I did with Em.

"Rosie?" his voice brought me back to reality.

I looked around and noticed that Alice and Bella have vanished while I was daydreaming. Emmett had his typical stupid grin on but his eyes had a soft edge around them that I haven't seen in quite some time.

"Evil pixie," I grumbled.

Emmett looked at me with an unspoken question in his eyes but I only rolled my eyes in response, hoping I wouldn't have to explain my train of thoughts. Alice deliberately left us here, so we would talk. Well, I could do that. And I wouldn't fall apart.

Emmett's face was turned down to the floor and his hands covered his forehead, as if something did upset him. He mumbled to himself and I tried to listen hard enough to make out the words he was saying, but for a moment, I heard nothing.

"Oh Rosie," hearing my own name shook me a little, but I didn't dare interrupt him. Plus, I was too curious what it was that had him saying my name without any bitterness or anger in his voice.

It almost… gave me hope, if I'd let myself acknowledge it.

"I miss you," Emmett whispered and his face lifted, his eyes meeting mine, both of our jaws dropping as we stared at each other.

For a second I wondered what to say, but words seemed to have escaped me. Then he blinked. Just blinked, nothing else, but it was enough to snap me out of my momentary reverie, make my heart beat as if I'd seen a train rushing straight into my face and I shivered, feeling my lips open.

"Em..." I heard myself whisper, "I miss us, too."

Just when I thought his eyes couldn't grow any bigger than they already were, they did, the blush in his cheeks intensified and I watched the corners of his mouth rise as his arm moved so he could reach my hand.

"I'm so sorry, Rosie," he whispered, "about everything. I messed up so much back then..."

I slowly withdrew my hand from his grip and turned my eyes down, not able to watch as the smile vanished from his face. He wanted to go back to what we had as if nothing had happened, but I couldn't give him that right now. I still remembered and I wasn't sure he'd changed enough.

"Em," I looked up at him again, "let's just... let's take this easy, please?"

He nodded at my question and I felt my own heart break at the sight of the disappointment in his face, but I couldn't go against my instincts. I needed to know he was going to stick around and actually be there this time.

"I don't hate you, you know?" I whispered and watched as the smile reached his eyes again.


	18. 17 Action Plan

**AN: Yes, this is my way of rewarding you guys for being so patient with me: two chapters in one night! ;) Hope you enjoy.**

Disclaimer: Crazy plot idea is mine, I can't claim nothing else... though if someone has Edward to sell, I'm game ;)

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**The Action Plan**

_Bella_

Alice was driving me crazy with all the stops she was making as we walked through the mall. Jasper joined us after we left Rose ad Emmett in the food court and I shot him disgruntled looks every 30 seconds or so, amazed to no end at how he was able to put up with her when she was in her shopping frenzy. He just kept softly smiling as he watched her bounce all over the place. The shop assistants seemed to be familiar with as little as Alice's voice and I was hoping I'd never have

to go through this again.

"Bella, look at this!" Alice was practically jumping on the spot in front of a display in the store Jasper and me were dragged into a minute earlier.

"What is it, pixie?" my body reluctantly moved towards her.

"You have to get this!" she was smiling and pointing at something.

"Alice," I sighed, "You know I can't…"

"Oh quiet, you," she laughed, "I'll get it then, it will be a belated congratulations present for you getting the job at the paper this summer," she shot before I could even start to protest about the possible price of whatever she was going to force on me.

"Jasper…" I pleaded with him, refusing to even look at the piece of clothing.

"Bella, look at the top," he whispered, "it practically screams your name."

I laughed at his comment, realizing just how much Alice as rubbed off on him over the years.

"Traitor," I giggled at him, but finally looked at the top in question, making myself assess it without automatically rejecting it.

I loved it, to put it simply. Never before would I have thought I'd actually be able to love a piece of clothing, but this top was really something I'd wear without feeling strange in it.

"And you have those ripped jeans to go with it, Bella," Alice gushed, "you will look perfect once I'm done with your hair."

"Alice," I shot her a wary look, "what are you planning?"

"Nothing," she said way too quietly and quickly, "can I not be thinking of a random opportunity? Does everything I do have a plan?"

Jasper was very wise to try to conceal his laughter behind a sudden coughing fit, even though Alice was on to him and I was mildly afraid of the repercussions the reaction would bring him. Thinking I had nothing to be afraid of when it comes to Alice, I didn't bother muffling my laughter as I watched the pixie's face turn angry.I should have known better.

"Well, since everyone seems to think I'm obsessive," Alice growled, "I might as well prove your point."

"Al..." Jasper and I tried to get a word in, neither of us too happy about having upset Alice.

"Oh shush. I need the two of you for this anyway," she laughed, anger forgotten.

"What is it this time?" I dared the question I wasn't sure I wanted to have answered.

"Rosalie and Emmett."

The simple mention of their names was enough to make Jasper and I understand what the result of her major plan was going to be. Not what she wanted it to be, but what she would make sure was going to happen.

"Al, but..." I mumbled.

"They do still love each other," Alice interrupted me, "all they need is a little push in the right direction."

"I know," I laughed, "I was just going to say that it might prove a bit tricky to get them to participate in whatever you were thinking of doing."

"Oh that's actually the easy part," Alice grinned, "It's Jasper's birthday, all we need to do is have a get-together at the house."

"And since they already live there..."

Jasper looked at me and knew he didn't need to finish the sentence. We were all in perfect understanding when it came to the where and when.

"How are you planning to convince them to even as much as not kill each other?" my eyes darted to the shop front to make sure Rosalie had not appeared behind our backs.

"Have you paid attention to them lately?" Alice shot me a challenging look, "there haven't been any major explosions on their floor for a while now."

"She's right," Jasper smiled, "it's not even the tension of a cold war, it's actually like they waved the white flag... or well, whichever colour the flag is in their case."

"That's true," I conceded, "they really haven't been fighting as much as we all expected them to. But… Alice, do you really think after everything that happened…"

"Yes," Al smiled, "despite how bad it looked when you moved to Forks, things will work out now."

Jasper nodded, "they hadn't split up because they didn't love each other, even if they were too stubborn to actually admit it."

"That's Emmett you're talking about, right?"

"And Rose," he grinned, "she wasn't going to admit she loved Em enough to give up on the whole 'I'm number one' facade she put up."

"So what else is the plan, Al?" I turned to the pixie, who was now bouncing around the shop again, getting too close to the lingerie section for my liking. I wasn't going to allow her to pick out anything from there, that much was sure. Definitely not with her boyfriend being around.

"You'll see," she smiled devilishly; "I can't give away everything, can I?"

"But Alice, I thought you wanted our help," I stared at her, a little confused.

"I need you to help with some things, not with everything," she finally got the subtle hint of me not following her towards the underwear and walked back over to us, "you need to convince Rose that the party is a surprise for Jazz and let her think she's getting some input."

"I'd rather deal with Emmett," I sighed, "can we not do it that way, Al? You're better with Rose and the with way she's been lately…"

"No, I need Emmett for the heavy lifting stuff, since I obviously can't ask Jasper."

"You're getting off easily in all this," I threw Jasper a quick but lethal look.

"Well, it is my birthday," he laughed softly and dodged the punch I was trying to land on his shoulder.

"So, what's Jasper's role in all the preparation for the big plan? Besides standing out of the way and looking pretty, of course?" I grumbled with more than a hint of sarcasm.

"He's going to get Edward to come over," Alice said and I felt my heart skip.

"Edward?" my voice felt shaky.

"Sure, he's one of the gang, Rose and Em would never buy into the party if he wasn't there," the pixie was saying as she was rifling through a sales rack.

I felt Jasper's eyes on me, so I dug into a basket of last season's styles to hide my rapidly reddening cheeks. I wondered how much he knew, especially since Alice only knew about that one night and the evening I spent reviewing the café he played in. It didn't take a psychic to realize that Jasper most likely knew about that. I just hoped that Edward and him were not on their old time speaking-until-dawn terms any more or that at least Edward woudn't have discussed anything regarding me with Jazz.

"So Bella, while we're on the topic of Edward," I heard Alice's voice right next to me ear, "did you ever return the hoodie from the other night to him?"

"Alice." I hissed, turning around sharply and noticed that Jasper was not around anymore.

"So? Did you?"

"No," I felt the heat in my cheeks, "there wasn't an appropriate way or time…"

"But you two have…"

"Al, please, let's not talk about this," I begged, not wanting to slip up and tell her more than she already knew.

"OK," she gave in so easily that I raised my eyebrow at her, but she just smiled back, not saying anything else.

Rather than questioning her on the unusual agreeing to drop something like this, I decided to just let it drop and allowed Alice to drag me along through the mall into a few more shops. Eventually we landed back in the food court where we'd left Rose and Emmett and I finally discovered where Jasper went hiding. He had a sneaky grin in his face and I figured it had something to do with Alice's big mission regarding the two people at the table who looked a bit too sombre compared to Jazz.

"Hey guys, let's head off," Al sighed, "I can't find anything else to buy."

We all laughed at her exasperation and I thanked my lucky stars for her decision to finish the torture she deemed shopping.

"Rose, can you come with Bella and me, so Jazz can get a ride with Emmett? We all need some girl time, right, Bella?"

Al's eyebrows shot up at the question and I didn't dare do anything but nod.

"Yeah, sure," Rosalie shrugged and we headed off to the car park.

After we got into the car, Alice immediately started to explain the master plan of the 'surprise' party for Jasper to Rosalie, who of course was immediately on board for it all, not showing even a hint of suspicion. I sat in the back seat, half-listening to Alice, but my mind kept dragging me off to Edward and whatever it was that we were doing the past few weeks.

I knew for a fact that I faked being drunk on at least one occasion, though I had no idea why, if I was being honest with myself. I could have stayed the last time and we could have talked about it. I could have used his hoodie that was still in my room, still smelling faintly of his aftershave, to initiate a talk. I didn't though and my reason for pure and simple fear. Fear of what he would say and do if we talked while completely sober. Knowing Alice, though, I knew the days of me running away from that particular conversation were counted.

As if she knew where my mind was escaping to, Alice turned to me after she pulled up at the house and her eyebrow shot up, her question unspoken, but the wheels in her mind working on overdrive behind the innocent expression on her face.


	19. 18 Candlelight

**AN: I am so so sorry for taking this long to update... I'd say a whole bunch of people has already given up on me :( Sadly, writer's block is no fun... **

**For everyone who's stuck with me: Merry Christmas & I hope you'll enjoy this ;) Oh and there's some goodies in my profile: I made a banner & I have links to a few of the outfits Bella's wearing in here. **

**And now to the good part:  
**

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**Candlelight**

_Edward_

The conversation with Emmett the day after my night with Bella didn't help much. Even that was the understatement of the century, if I was being honest. I was just as confused about the whole Bella situation as I had been before I talked to him, except now there was the danger of the rest of the gang finding out about all that had been going on. A few days later and I was still none the wiser regarding my feelings, her feelings or anyone else's thoughts, since I made sure not to run into any of them. I've seen Alice and Jasper at the club last night, but I avoided them at the end by staying for drinks with the staff after closing time.

I figured Alice had her suspicions, but Jasper and Rosalie were the ones I was more worried about. Either of them was well capable of ripping my head and various other body parts off, not stopping to let me explain that I wasn't trying to hurt Bella. Absent-mindedly, I reached for her hoodie that was still hanging off the chair next to my bed and breathed in her perfume like the pathetic hormonal boy with a crush that I was.

Wait, what? Crush?

My eyes shot up and found the mirror hanging on my wardrobe. I was met with a puzzled look that perfectly expressed how I felt for once.

Did I have a crush on Bella? Granted, my adult self laughed at the use of the word, but what else could it be? Whatever Bella and I had going on was beyond a casual fling, judging by the fact that neither of us was obviously willing to talk about it that way. Or any other way, now that I actually thought about every time I had seen Bella since the first 'reunion' night. If it was just casual, we would have done the awkward morning greeting and possibly exchanged phone numbers to give each other the chance for a booty call.

I knew all too well how much I liked Bella even back in school, I remembered the meadow and the afternoon spent away from the madness that was the graduation party at Alice's house. I remembered how much I wanted to have more time to spend with her, but I left for college shortly after and the chances to talk to her became fewer and further apart.

"Edward?" Jasper's voice came from the front hall, "Are you OK?"

"Yeah, Jazz, come in," I called out to him.

"The guy from the reception let me in," Jas explained as he reached my bedroom, "I tried to call you, but…"

I remembered my phone that was now most likely off, as I never thought to charge my battery.

"Sorry, I forgot to plug the phone in," I explained while rummaging in my bedside table for the charger.

"I figured it was something like that," Jasper laughed, "I'd be a bit put off if you'd ignored me deliberately."

"Why would I do that?" I attempted to sound offended but as our eyes met, we both laughed.

Jasper threw me a can of Coke after dropping a shopping bag on the table in the sitting room and I gave him a thankful look.

"I thought you could do with some refreshment," he said between gulps of his own Coke, "you look like I thought you would."

"Huh?" my confused look returned to my face.

"I just figured you stayed out a little longer than you'd planned last night."

In the silence that followed, my mind prepared itself for the 'what have you done?' and 'hurt her and I will kill you' speeches, but Jasper didn't look like he was about to rip me a new one.

"Are you okay?" he said quietly, concern obvious in his voice.

"Fine," I lied.

"Edward…"

"I'm… confused," I finally said aloud, not sure if he would understand.

"You like her a lot, right?"

My eyes flew open as my head spun around to face him and I felt my jaw drop.

"How…"

"You're both way too obvious," he laughed softly, "even without Alice's interfering and nosy ways; I see there's something going on."

Jasper looked at me and I could feel him willing me to slip into confessional mode, but I wasn't ready to share anything too specific. And that included my feelings for Bella, whatever they were or weren't. For a while, we sat in silence, sipping on our drinks and I let my mind drift off to the fateful night again. Bella leaving while as far as she thought I was still asleep had hit me more than I expected and I now wished I hadn't let her walk out like that.

I shook my head to throw off the thoughts and finally took a proper look at Jasper. He was way too dressed up for a casual visit and I suddenly realized I forgot it was his birthday. Jumping off the couch, I walked into my bedroom and rummaged through my desk for the present I got him a few weeks ago.

"Hey," his voice was right next to me and I jumped a little in surprise, "Sorry, I didn't mean to scare you, but you darted out of the room so suddenly, I wondered if you were alright" Jasper's voice trailed off.

"Happy birthday, man," I smiled as I handed him the package I finally noticed on the shelf above my desk.

"Thanks," his concern vanished out of his face and he began opening the gift.

But as he moved to leave the wrapping paper in the basket next to the desk, he froze for a moment and my eyes followed his gaze to Bella's hoodie lying on my bed.

"Is that…"

"Jasper, I…" my voice got caught in my throat as I waited for him to shout at me or punch me.

But he simply stood there and watched me, waiting for me to say … I wasn't sure what he wanted me to say. Was I supposed to apologize, to explain, or to tell him how I felt about her?

"Edward," Jasper once again brought me back to reality, "I can drop it back to her, if you want…" he let his voice fade.

"No," I said quickly, maybe too quickly, "I'll … It might get us talking if I do it."

"Sure," Jasper laughed, "why don't you bring it with you tonight?"

"Tonight?"

"Alice is planning a party she thinks I don't know about," he grinned, "and I'm here to drag you out to the dinner we're apparently going to," he pointed out his clothes, "so you better get ready."

Without thinking twice about what I was doing, I walked to my wardrobe, took out a shirt and a decent pair of jeans, looking at Jasper for approval. After he confirmed that the dinner wasn't going to be a completely formal affair and jeans were fine, channelling Alice for a moment as he suggested I wear a navy shirt with a black tie, I headed off to the shower, so we could leave shortly.

We were just in time for the booking at the restaurant and we were the first ones to arrive, which Jasper seemed to have expected as he mumbled something about a dramatic entrance. We were led to the reserved table, which was decorated in a romantic theme more suitable for Valentine's Day than a birthday dinner, candles burning in the centrepiece and everything on the table having a red rose theme.

I tried to not look confused, but failed miserably, though I was wrong in hoping for an explanation from him. The enlightening regarding the dramatic entrance came from somewhere else entirely.

Alice walked in about ten minutes later, as we were finishing our first drink of the night and she was followed by an amused-looking Rosalie and a shockingly dressed-up Emmett. But my eyes were glued to one face and one face only.

Bella was wearing a top in exactly the same colour as my shirt and I would've raised my eyebrow at Jasper questioningly if I had been able to tear my gaze from her. She seemed taller than usual and after my eyes finished following the curve of her perfectly fitting jeans, I noted that she was surprisingly wearing high heels, which must've been Alice's doing.

I was lost.

"Hey guys," Alice's chirpy voice took my attention away from Bella, who was now at the table but not before I realized Bella had seen me stare nor before I noticed a blush on her cheeks.

Rosalie slightly frowned as she realized she was expected to be sitting next to Emmett, but surprisingly, the outburst I expected never came. She and Emmett exchanged a look which could only be described as private and they remained silent as they sat down on their chairs.

I wasn't sure what happened during the dinner, my mind too occupied with the way the candlelight made Bella's hair shimmer, because before long, we were gathering up to leave. Jasper's presents were apparently waiting for him at the house and I briefly considered leaving to my own place as I've already done that part.

"Edward," Rosalie turned to me, "You are coming over, aren't you?"

"Um… yeah, sure," I mumbled unconvincingly, but found my hand being held by Alice's.

"Of course he is," she laughed, "the night is not over yet."

"Alice," I pulled her towards me, "what have you got planned?"

"Oh nothing much, just a few more drinks to celebrate Jazz's milestone," she giggled, her eyes not meeting mine.

She was definitely up to something, but I had no chance to protest as we left the restaurant and found cabs already waiting for us at the entrance. Emmett was already in the front seat of the first one and Alice let my hand go to drag Jasper into the backseat.

"Edward, come on," Rosalie laughed, "you are not escaping this."

Bella was sitting in the back of the other taxi, talking to Rose in the front and I climbed in next to her, our hands brushing against each other as we put on our seatbelts. The sparks of electricity jumping from her skin to mine made me shiver and almost groan in frustration. Being so close to her all I wanted to do was to touch her, but Rosalie seemed to keep an eye on me all the way to the house.

As I watched Bella get out of the cab, her shirt clinging to the curves of her body, my mind was only occupied by one thought.

The woman was going to be the death of me.


	20. 19 Can I Stay

**AN: I am so so so so sorry for how delayed this chapter is! I got stuck with writing and rabid bunnies attacked every semblance of plot I had in my mind... they're kind of hiding now, so it's back to writing ;) **

Hope you enjoy!

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**Can I Stay**

_Bella_

I felt Edward's eyes on me every time he looked at my direction throughout Jasper's celebration dinner and I cursed Alice for interfering with my hair. She put it up so I couldn't even hide behind the veil it usually provided. But then the lack of visual barriers between us made me pay more attention to him and I noticed that the color of his shirt perfectly matched my top. I briefly raised my eyebrow at Jasper, who was the one picking him up for the 'party' or whatever Alice had decided it was going to be.

The ride in the cab was almost painful, having him so close to me and constantly reminding myself not to touch him. Well, I wasn't going to deal with him pulling away or shooting me down if we were going to be in the same room for who knows how long while the other four were possibly going to be all touchy-feely. And I would bet that Rose and Emmett weren't going to stay away from each other for too long.

"Bella," Alice pulled me into the kitchen immediately after I walked through the door, "I need your help."

"I hope it doesn't involve me carrying anything breakable, Al," I warned her, "in these shoes, I am not trusting myself to stay upright."

"You'll be fine," she rolled her eyes at me, "but no, it's plastic cups and the bucket with ice."

"Champagne?" I noticed the bottle in her hand.

"It is Jazz's birthday," she simply shrugged her shoulders.

"Alice, no," I realized the other bottle she was carrying over was tequila, "that's never a good idea."

She ignored me and walked purposefully into the sitting room, where her entrance was met by whoops from Emmett, reacting to the bottle of Cuervo without a doubt. I grabbed the ice bucket, wondering briefly what she needed it for and followed her, the plastic champagne glasses tucked safely under my arm.

"Jack, Jose and Johnny," I heard Rose mumble, "the only men a girl can depend on."

That cleared up the ice issue. Alice was going for the sharp guns that much was for sure.

Alice took the flutes off me and handed the champagne bottle to Jasper to open. I narrowly avoided being knocked out as the cork flew across the room. With a mumbled 'to Jasper', I downed the first glass without as much as blinking, realizing that getting drunk was the only way to be able to escape to my room early.

"How about we play a game?" Alice asked after the second round was poured.

"Have I never?" Jasper offered and got a shower of refusals accompanied by various expletives in response. We tried that back in high school a few times and it always ended in tears. Plus, we all knew each other well enough to get ourselves drunk in the space of about ten 'I have never' lines, especially since we were apparently doing shots.

"What do you guys think of truth or dare?" Emmett asked all innocently.

"Well I think that you should go back to your princess sleepovers," I gave him a murderous glare.

At this, everyone burst out in laughter, quite likely imagining Emmett in a set of pink pajamas and a tiara.

"What's a good drinking game that's not too corny for you grownups then?" Alice shot looks at all of us besides Emmett, who obviously won points with her by suggesting Truth or Dare.

"Do you have a copy of Ally McBeal?" Edward offered, "or M.A.S.H.?"

"Yes, because TV related drinking games are not corny," Alice rolled her eyes at him.

"Oh you guys are just chickening out," Emmett grumbled, grabbed the bottle of tequila, poured himself a glass and downed it, "there, that should start us all nicely."

We all laughed and watched him fill shot glasses on the coffee table, each of us reaching for one without any more hesitation.

Eventually, when we were buzzed enough, we ended up playing a shockingly mild version of 'I have never'. Mild possibly because all it took was one 'I have never made out with a girl' from Emmett and a shot going down Alice's throat for her and Jasper to practically sprint upstairs into their room.

"OK, I need a few more if I have to listen to them for the rest of the night," Rose pretended to roll her eyes up towards the third floor and grabbed the bottle of JD. We all laughed but followed her example and all of us took another swig of the drink we had in front of us, the tequila in my case.

Only a few minutes later, Rose and Emmett were lost in a conversation about something I couldn't follow, possibly because the tequila was starting to have a little bit too much of an effect on me. Throwing them one last look and a mumbled excuse, I stood up, holding on to the sofa because I shortly lost my balance and headed for the stairs. I felt Edward's eyes on me, but I didn't turn around as I walked to the stairs and up to my room.

Without bothering to turn on my light, I slipped out of the jeans and top, but my energy was out after that, so I didn't bother to search for my pajamas. The house was warm and I was alone in my room, it wouldn't be an issue if I stayed almost naked. Or so I thought. Seconds later, I was in dreamland, only vaguely aware of the soft music playing on my stereo.

_Can I stay here with you_

_till the morning_

_I am so far from home_

_and I feel a little stoned_

_so can I stay here with you_

_till the morning?_

Safely in dreamland, I imagined Edward's body next to mine his arms wrapped around me just being there. Of course, seconds into the dream, my body reacted the way it usually did to thoughts of him and I felt the heat and wetness between my legs. Slowly, I brought my hand down to my core and began running my fingers over my folds, trying to release some of the tension. It wasn't as good as if it had been Edward, but since I figured he was already on the way to his place and I wasn't going to make a fool of myself in front of Em and Rose, I wasn't left with another option.

My fingers slid into me easily as I was already wet simply because I had been in Edward's presence for the most part of the evening. Trying to imagine how it would feel if his hands were on me instead, I rubbed my clit with my thumb and my breathing slowly became heavier.

The soft light from the hallway was quickly shut out by my eyelids as I lost myself in memories of the last night I spent with Edward. I shook off the frightening thought that I might be falling for him and only focused on how amazingly we worked in bed, how he seemed to know and work my body as if he were especially made for me.

I almost screamed when I felt the bed move with the weight of a body descending on it, but I was quickly calmed down when a pair of lips met mine and a hand that was not mine pushed my thumb away. Instantly, I knew it was Edward, since no one else would've smelt like him or known how to touch me the exact way I needed.

His fingers joined mine inside me and the sensation was beyond anything I ever dreamed of. Within moments, my head was spinning and I clutched to him with my free hand, my fingers entangled in the hair of the back of his head. As I came, I could've sworn I saw stars and fireworks behind my eyelids and only managed to shake off that ridiculous thought when my body stopped shaking and I managed to take a breath.

When I turned to Edward and reached to do the same for his as he'd done for me, he surprised me by stopping my hand and wrapping his arms around me. I felt him place a soft kiss into my hair just before sleep overcame me, his voice mumbling something my brain couldn't grasp.

_So can I stay, here with you, through the night time_

_I've fallen so sad it's true, now won't you take me to your room_

_Lay with me in your thinnest dress_

_fill my heart with each caress_

_between your blissful kisses, whisper_

_Darling is this love?_

_Whisper to me, is this love?_

When I woke up in the morning, the space next to me in the bed was empty.


	21. 20 Climbing The Walls

**AN: OK, so sorry to leave you on a bit of a cliffhanger for such a long time... well, no, not really ;) But Edward found it "difficult" to express himself... you'll see why.**

Enjoy ;)

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**Climbing the Walls**

_Edward_

When I finally found my bed just as the sun came out, it felt awkwardly cold and empty. My eyes closed and I let the tiredness take over my body, since my feet refused to cooperate with pacing around.

"_Edward…" the soft whisper hit my ears as I walked out of the bathroom and got ready to head down to the sofa that I assigned for myself. I was way too drunk to go home, but sober enough to not try and crash in someone's room as that usually ended in disaster._

_I was on the same floor as Bella's room was on, that much I was painfully aware of when I walked into the bathroom and locked the door. More than I needed to use it for the official reason I gave Rosalie and Emmett, I wanted some privacy and this was easier than going home._

"_Edward…" the voice was now louder and I was convinced that I hadn't imagined it._

_My feet ignored my brain's screams about how this wasn't safe or nice or any of that rubbish. They simply followed my hard-on down the short corridor to a door that was partially open. When I stopped in the door frame, it took me only a second to readjust my eyes to the darkness and the sight that welcomed me was so breathtaking, I nearly gasped out loud._

_Bella was lying on her bed, her eyes closed, body arched up and her mouth slightly open as she whispered my name over and over. I followed the curve of her body with my eyes and stopped at the sight of her thumb rubbing over her clit and two fingers disappearing inside her. I felt a little like a stalker when I moved towards the bed to get a better view of her, but I couldn't stop myself. I didn't know whether it was because of the alcohol in my system_ _or the fact that I was finally wrapping my head around the fact that I might like her._

_All I knew in that moment was that I needed to touch her, even though it was a turn-on to watch her like this._ _I almost jumped on the bed, but decided to slide gently next to her, quickly covering her lips with mine to stop a possible scream, as I was pretty sure she wasn't expecting anyone to join her. Immediately, she relaxed and I let my hands caress her body, sliding one down to her core where I replaced her thumb with mine on her clit. Once again, her body arched off the bed when my fingers joined hers following the same rhythm she had started on her own. It didn't take long for her to tense around the fingers and I pressed my lips against her mouth to capture the loud moan escaping out of her throat. _

_When the trembling of her body faded away, she reached out to me so she could repay the favour, but it wasn't what I was looking for. Instead, I wrapped my arms around her and buried my face in her hair. I heard her breathing even out and I watched her peaceful face for a while._

'_Damn, Bella, you have my head spinning in all directions,' I whispered into her hair, 'I can't do this anymore, not like this. I think…'_

I never finished that thought while whispering to her for fear that she wasn't completely asleep and would've heard me. But that moment, with my arms wrapped around her and breathing in her perfume, I knew I didn't want to leave. I fell in love with Bella Swan and I was pretty sure she didn't feel the same way about me, so when I was convinced that she was deep in the land of dreams, I slipped away and pretty much ran home.

When I got there, I jumped straight into the cold shower and let it wash over me, trying to decode the thoughts in my own brain. The thoughts didn't stop as I paced around the apartment in a haze caused by my long night, but too preoccupied to let sleep take over. I had a vague idea of where I was going to go with my train of thoughts, but I was so terrified of the result at that point, I desperately needed to do it gradually. Sadly, that wasn't to be as before I came to the one obvious conclusion and came to terms with it, I was yanked out of my reverie and out of my bed by a loud voice booming through my apartment.

"Edward! I hear the shower, I know you're there, get out!" Emmett's voice made the walls shake a little and I reluctantly left my wet sanctuary.

"What, grizzly?" I growled at him as I finally made it out to the kitchen. _Note to self: do NOT give Emmett keys to your place again. In fact, take away the one he has now._

"Oh don't be so grumpy Edward, it's like you haven't gotten laid for months," Em laughed but when I froze, he immediately pulled his head out of the cupboard he was rummaging through.

"What?" I snapped at him as he gave me a long stare.

"You _have_ gotten laid recently, right?" he asked, referring to our conversation a while ago.

"I am _not_ having this conversation with you again," I grabbed my coffee cup, determined to ignore him.

"Did you talk to Bella?" his tone softened and he sat down at the table, watching me as I made my caffeine fix.

"No," I sighed, "It's not like we had a chance to talk. Last night wasn't the best time, was it?"

"Edward, you have to talk to her," Emmett said with an unusually serious tone, "the way the girl looks at you, it's just…"

"Did she say something?" my head snapped and my eyes were glued to his face, looking for a glimmer of something that would give me hope.

"No, but I have eyes. The two of you were practically glowing with tension last night," he snorted, "if it were anyone else, I'd tell you to just get over it, but…"

"I don't know how, Emmett. I… oh crap."

"You have fallen for her, haven't you?"

"Yeah," I said, exasperated by the conversation and by the state of my life.

"Just… tell her," Emmett looked at me, "It can't hurt, can it?"

"It can, but that's not the problem," I stood up and paced around the kitchen, "I just freeze anytime I want to talk to her."

I quickly gave Emmett a rundown of how I left in the morning and how I almost told Bella about my feelings. I left out the intimate details as I was quite sure she would kill me by throwing me under a horde of elephants if I told anyone. But I did mention to him that when I started telling her, she was most likely already asleep and couldn't hear me. Emmett insisted that I just go over and talk to her, but I was quite sure that I didn't have the courage to just tell her outright.

When he left, I got dressed and looked over my schedule at the café for the week and realized I was pencilled down to play in a few days. Suddenly, I had an idea and my face brightened with a smile. She would remember. I was convinced she'd recognize the song I now planned on playing.

And if she didn't, Alice would know and … this had to work.

I sat down with my composition book and flipped through it until I landed on the first song I ever wrote, back in high school. We may have been kids at the time, but I realized, looking through the notes on the paper, that my revelation hadn't been entirely accurate. I haven't just fallen in love with Bella now; I had been in love with her since the night of her graduation party.


	22. 21 What If

**AN: Apologies for the delay & if anyone is still holding out for this, thank you! 3 Writer's block is not my friend.**

Disclaimer: the characters are SMeyer's.

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_**Emmett**_

"Rosie?" I whispered into the silence of the room.

We were left alone after the others left one by one, to places I didn't even want to know about. Rose seemed lost in thought since Edward walked out with the vague and unconvincing excuse of looking for a bathroom and I didn't expect him to re-emerge. I was sure Rose wasn't too thrilled with whatever was happening between him and Bella. I also knew it was partly because of what had happened to us.

"Rose, I..."

She turned to me and I could see tears in her eyes. They brought back memories of when we broke up and I wanted to make it up to her. I wanted to sweep her off her feet, shower her with anything she'd wish for, make sure her dreams came true.

"...I'm sorry." My voice broke as I said the words and reached for her hand.

"What for, Em?"

She sounded broken, so unlike the Rose everyone always saw, so unlike the Rosalie I knew. It hit me like a brick that I was partially responsible for her feeling this way and I wished I could undo everything.

"For everything. For having been a selfish idiot back in school."

"Stop, Em," she gave my hand a little squeeze, "it wasn't just you and you know that."

"Yeah, but..."

"No. I could've tried more, but I was too proud to admit how much I actually cared. It hurt me that you seemed to not care as much at the time."

"That's one of the things I'm most sorry for. I should've showed you more, Rosie," I sighed, "but then, I was so stupid I didn't realize how much I took for granted."

"We were young, Em."

"Naive and immature."

"Yeah, well..."

We both laughed, our hands still joined and I enjoyed the warmth from the connection. In the silence of the house it was good to talk a little, so we did - about the time we were apart, about high school, about everything we could think of. At some point, we moved over to my bedroom, sat on the bed and kept talking.

"Hey, did you hear that?" Rose jumped a little as the front door closed and I walked to the window to peek outside.

I had a fair idea that it was Edward leaving, most likely having spent whatever time between when he left the sitting room until now in Bella's room. While the two of them together still wasn't the most pleasant thought I could have, there was something between them that was undeniable.

"Em, do you think you could..?"

"Go talk to him? Yeah, I was thinking of that."

" They're running around in circles, you know, ever since that night Ali got us all together."

" I have a funny feeling it's been longer than that."

"Longer as in back in school?"

I nodded.

"But, Edward pretty much left when Bella moved there," Rose looked confused, "it's not like they were around each other that much then."

" Babe, it took me one look to fall for you both times..."

Rosalie's eyes shot up, I realized what I'd just said, and she got off the bed to walk over to me. Her eyes stayed on mine as she approached and I wrapped my arms around her, pulling her close. My breathing almost stilled as she rested her cheek on my shoulder and we stood there for a moment, just revelling in being close to each other again after all the time.

"Rosie?"

"Yeah," she mumbled into my t-shirt.

"I want to do this right." I took a breath, "Rose, I don't want to mess us up again and I do want to give this a shot."

" Me too," she lifted her head to face me, "and we're a bit more adult now. Well, I am."

I laughed a little before I pulled all my courage together to ask what I knew I needed to ask. "Rose, could I take you out on a date?" I nearly pleaded, desperation obvious in my tone.

"Yeah," she breathed out and wrapped her arms tighter around me, her head again resting on my shoulder as we watched the sunrise.

"I need to go talk to Edward." I reluctantly pulled away.

"I might try to talk to Bella," Rose sighed, "or Alice, who probably knows way more than any of us."

It suddenly dawned on me that our get-togethers in the last while seemed a little bit too convenient and that all of them had been organized by the little devious matchmaker.

"Yeah, I'd say Alice knows a lot that we don't," I said with a raised eyebrow.

Rose looked at me like I was crazy for a moment, then her face cleared with understanding and immediately fell into a frown.

"Hey," I lifted her chin as I felt her muscles tense in anger, "it's not like we're not used to her meddling." My words didn't help much, so I pulled her into my arms again to calm her.

"It sort of worked, didn't it?" I dared a small smile.

"Yeah," she said in a resigned tone, "sort of."

" Now, I do believe I have some business to attend to," I rolled my eyes and smiled as she laughed, "but when I'm back, we'll talk about the date."

I didn't bother changing, just threw on a sweater and walked out the door to talk to Edward. Knowing his stubbornness, it wasn't likely to be an easy conversation, but I'd had enough of watching them both tiptoe around each other. It turned out to be easier and harder than I thought. As we talked, I quickly realized that Edward was in even deeper than he knew.

"I don't know how, Emmett. I… oh crap."

" You have fallen for her, haven't you?"

As I asked the question, I already knew the answer, it was written all over Ed's face in bright shiny markers. I couldn't understand how in the world they didn't see it themselves.  
I left Edward to mull things over, hoping that he'd find the courage to just talk to Bella. On the way home, I walked past a small shop with trinkets and one of them caught my eye in the window, so I decided to follow a whim and bought it.

Rose was nowhere to be seen when I got to the house, so I just walked over to my room, and crashed, but not before I left the new purchase by the bathroom mirror. I was sure Rose would see it there and I was still too much of a chicken to face the possibility of her not liking it.

When I woke up the sun was already gone and my room was only illuminated by the dim light from underneath the bathroom door. As I stirred, my hand brushed against my phone on the pillow next to me. I quickly checked it for any missed calls, but only found one text. Noticing it was from Rose, I quickly opened it and gazed at the attached picture with the words "Thank you" in a bit of a shock. The delicate bracelet wrapped around Rose's wrist and the charms resting against her skin looked as perfect as I imagined them to be and I was relieved that she didn't seem to think it was too much, too soon. Maybe things would work out this time around after all.


	23. 22 All I Can Breathe

**AN: Edward has decided to speak up, finally. Please enjoy ;)**

Disclaimer: Do not own. I may own some fancy little gadgets, though ;)

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**All I Can Breathe**

_**Edward**_

My feet have almost worn a path into the carpet as I paced around the room. My mind flicked through the options I had in order to achieve what I wanted, but none of them seemed particularly inviting. To involve Emmett into this more wasn't really going to help me iron out all the details, asking Rosalie was out of question. Technically, I could only rely on Jasper or Alice, but roping one in generally meant the other would tag along and the less people knew beforehand, the better.

"Come on, Edward," I mumbled into the silence of the room, "You're not going to pull this off by yourself."

Before I could start talking to myself _and_ answering myself, I pulled myself together and reached for my phone, dialing a number blindly.

"Hi Ali," I whispered, hesitation poured into every word, "I need help with something."

To Alice's credit, she didn't shout, squeal or laugh at me, though I wondered if that was because someone was in the room with her. Someone who most likely wasn't Jasper. The thoughts of Bella distracted me momentarily, but then I got back to reality and explained my plan to Alice.

"That won't be a problem," she said, business tone firmly in place, confirming my suspicion of Bella being in the room with her.

"Thank you, Ali," I grinned, "I just... I just hope it works."

"It will be fine," she said gently and I heard a door slam in the background.

"I don't..."

"Edward, don't start questioning yourself. Or her, for that matter. Now, I may be an interfering pixie, but you guys..."

Her voice faded and I could almost hear her thinking, before she gasped.

_Oh crap, what now?_

"Edward, how long?"

Without having to listen to the rest of her question, I knew what she was asking about.

"Senior year, Forks High."

"But you barely acknowledged her then!"

"Ali, I was an idiot. I know it now," I sighed, exasperated, "and by now I mean this morning. Can you help me fix it?"

"I don't think there's anything that needs to be fixed," she laughed, "but a little push in the right direction couldn't hurt."

"Don't tell Jasper, please?" I pleaded, hoping she would understand why.

"I won't, but he tends to figure a lot by himself, you know?"

"Yes, I have noticed that," sarcasm dripped from my voice but I laughed.

We chatted for another couple of minutes about the details and when she hung up, I started pacing, though the reason was different.

_Will I be able to pull this off? Will it work?_

A knock on my door interrupted my panicking and I walked over to open it, not even bothering to look through the peephole.

"Jasper?"

"Yeah, hi," he laughed and pushed his way into my apartment.

"What can I do for you?"

"Oh nothing," he rolled his eyes, "Alice sent me on an errand."

"Huh?"

"That's for you," he motioned to a garment bag now hanging off the kitchen door, "there's a note and everything."

"Did she...?"

"Look, man, I'm just a messenger," he laughed, "don't worry about it."

"Thanks," I looked at the bag, confused.

"OK, I'm off," Jasper headed for the door again, "you're playing tonight, right?"

"Yeah."

"Well, I think Ali is planning to make it an outing, seeing as our last one was an entire week ago," we both laughed, Jasper more lightly than me, "just thought I'd warn you."

I nodded, knowing he was referring to Bella being there tonight. I already knew this, but I wasn't going to jinx the plan.

"Does Bella know?"

"No, Alice's orders, something about not giving her a chance to find an excuse."

He looked at me with a mix of understanding and curiosity, aware that something was afoot, but not sure what. My eyes pleaded with him to drop the topic and Jasper being Jasper, he did.

"See you tonight then," he said as he walked out the door.

I wondered briefly how long I'd been pacing and thinking, seeing as Ali managed to get whatever was in the bag _and_ send Jasper here with it.

My eyes nearly bugged out of my head when I realized that I had only about an hour left before I absolutely had to be at the cafe. No time for calling Alice to calm me down, no time to panic anymore.

I ran into the shower and for various reasons made it a cold and short one, then finally opened the garment bag Ali sent. A little apprehension flashed through me before I saw the contents, but I was relieved to find a shirt, pants and a tie. She didn't go overboard, which was very welcome.

And considerably unlike Alice, which would've worried me a little if it wasn't for the fact that I was nearly running late. Tonight was not a night where this would be acceptable, at least not for me.

I walked through the back door as usual and said a quick hello to Leah. She handed me a glass of my favourite wine and I took a sip to calm my nerves. Playing piano with shaking hands rarely gives good results.

"Get a grip, Cullen," I frowned at myself, "you've played all this before."

But I had not been aware of her in the room, I played those songs for her, but thinking she would not ever hear them. Now I was here and volunteering my heart and soul on a silver plate.

"Hi Edward!" Alice bounced into the backroom.

She was actually bouncing, feet off the ground, excited like a little child at Christmas. I laughed at her and that relaxed me a bit.

"Everyone's out there already, but we had sort of an," she hesitated, "early start."

"What do you mean by early start?"

"Bella is buzzed," she laughed, "big time."

"Alice!"

"I know, but she didn't tell me she had nothing to eat until we were here and she'd had two tequila shots."

"Does she know I'm playing?"

"No," Alice glanced towards the door, "but I think she's nervous about being here in general. You know, just in case you _are_ playing."

"Did you not tell her I'd be joining you guys?"

"I did, but Bella seems to think I'm untrustworthy with such information," Alice smirked, "girl is smarter than she thinks."

"OK, I have to go out there," my hands shook again, "but is there a point?"

"She's fine, Edward," Alice smiled gently, "she's not completely wasted."

"I hope not. I don't think I can do this again."

"You'll be great, as usual," she grabbed my hand and led me towards the main room.

I didn't dare look into the room, but headed straight to the piano on stage and only noticed the lights dimming. The little lamp above me was already lit and I was able to focus solely on the piano keys and the songs now floating through my mind. There was no hesitation or fear in me anymore as I launched into an instrumental version of _Iris_, my mind shouting the words at me.

_And I'd give up forever to touch you_

_Cause I know that you feel me somehow_

_You're the closest to heaven that I'll ever be_

_And I don't want to go home right now_

_And all I can taste is this moment_

_And all I can breathe is your life_

_Cause sooner or later it's over_

_I just don't want to miss you tonight_

_And I don't want the world to see me_

_Cause I don't think that they'd understand_

_When everything's made to be broken_

_I just want you to know who I am_

_And you can't fight the tears that ain't coming_

_Or the moment of truth in your lies_

_When everything seems like the movies_

_Yeah you bleed just to know you're alive_

_And I don't want the world to see me_

_Cause I don't think that they'd understand_

_When everything's made to be broken_

_I just want you to know who I am_

I didn't allow myself breathing space and immediately continued into a song I've played in the cafe before, the first night Bella saw me playing. This time, though, I knew there were two people in the room who'd understand its meaning. But I didn't want to dwell on that, so I kept playing before I chickened out.

The last few tones of the song faded out and I took a deep breath before turning to the audience. I quickly spotted Alice, her mouth slightly open in shock and I knew she figured it out. Rose's expression was less open but similar, so I knew the guys didn't spill the beans.

I looked for Bella, but she wasn't with the others and I wondered for a moment if she'd left. That would be just my luck, her not being there when I finally opened up enough.

"Edward," her voice came from a lot closer than I expected it.

Bella stood in front of the small stage, her eyes wide, her cheeks flushed. I stepped down, knowing I had a moment before I was due to play again.

"You..." she kept her eyes glued to mine, "I remember this."

My hands found hers and I kept our connection when I pulled her a little closer.

"You played this the night we were in the meadow."

"That was the first time ever," I explained, "but how did you hear it?"

"I came down to talk to you some more, but you were playing and it was so beautiful and it was too much and..."

"Sssh," my finger reached up to her face to stop her from talking.

Then, on impulse, for the first time ever I was stone-cold sober as my lips met hers.


	24. 23 Revelation

**AN: The chapter title says it all, really ;)**

Disclaimer: Do not own Edward or Bella or anything else related to Twilight. I just about own enough patience to push through ffic uploading/updating issues ;)

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**Revelation**

_Bella_

My eyes opened slowly and my eyelids fell back closed immediately due to the almost painful light. I tried to remember where I was from the broken bits of memory, but it was all too cloudy. I rubbed my eyes to get them to open and looked around. As I moved, I felt someone's warmth next to me and pieces of the previous evening came to mind again.

I finally forced my eyes to open and look around, my surroundings confirming what had gone through my mind was not just a dream. I was in his apartment and minute by unfolding minute, the evening that got me here ran through my aching head. I turned a little and saw him next to me, sleeping peacefully. I gently moved the blanket over him as it had slipped down, and sighed softly, trying not to wake him up.

The next thing I became aware of was that below the blanket I had just moved up was nothing but his body, no T-shirt, no pajama, no shirt, nothing that I could see. I lifted the blanket gently and noticed he was not even wearing any sort of underwear. I shivered a second later because the cool air blew under the blanket and I realized he was not the only completely naked one in the bed. I turned around frantically and tried to find my shirt or at least my underwear.

"Not again," I sighed, "somebody tell me we didn't do it again."

I tried not to talk to myself, but considering he was asleep and there was no one else around, a fact which made me happy, I said a few lines to myself, cursing my own stupidity. How could I allow myself to get so drunk and let him bring me to his place again?

My mind desperately tried to put the puzzle of separate memories together, but it did not really get further than the moment I'd met him, as the evening was very hazy in my memory from about the third drink I'd had. I knew we were at our favourite cafe last night and I knew we had not come there together. I'd bumped into him at the bar and we had talked, then danced and then went back to the bar. From then on, I did vaguely remember us dancing again for a while and even singing karaoke, but the moment we decided to leave did not come to my mind at all. Almost as if I had pushed it out of my mind deliberately because I had not wanted to know that I'd left with him.

"_No, that wasn't last night, that was the first time I woke up here plus a few fantasies,_" I thought as I glanced at the shape next to me.

"How did I get here?" I whispered into the silence of the room, "and what in the world happened last night?"

Still under the blanket, I try to locate my clothes. Suddenly I felt a finger running over my bare back. I shivered softly and tried to ignore it, but I was well aware that he woke up and that I wouldn't be able to leave his place as inconspicuously as I'd planned to. His hand moved to my shoulder and rested there for a while before he pulled me closer to him. In a moment of what I would normally call a loss of my sanity, I let him wrap his arms around me and softly shivered at the coolness of his fingers on my stomach.

The touch of his body brought me back to reality and I pulled away to look for my shirt again. He didn't let me slip away that easily and I felt his lips softly kissing my shoulders and drawing my hair aside before he moved to my neck, tenderly biting down and causing me to tremble all over. His hands rested on my stomach and around my shoulders and I suddenly lost the will to move away.

He shifted higher and leaned on his arm before he gave me one of his most beautiful smiles and bent down to kiss me. His lips touched mine and I knew that I'd lost the fight with myself, though until then I'd almost convinced myself to leave. His lips danced tenderly over mine and as our tongues met, I gave in to him and raised my arms to wrap them around him. I felt him shivering because my fingertips were cold, but it didn't last long; I moved my hands up to his head and ran my fingers through his hair, the kiss getting more passionate with each second. He let himself fall down on the bed, turned around until he was on his back, pulling me with him all the time, our lips not parting for even a second.

I drew away from him then, smiled down and watched the pair of shining eyes in front of me. His hands wandered up and down my back and before I could bend back down and kiss him again, he turned me around so that I was on my back next to him. His lips met mine again, but only for a soft kiss before he moved to my ear and softly blew over it, causing the shivers to take control of my body. Then I felt his tongue dancing over my earlobe and I closed my eyes, trying to get a grip of my feelings.

His hand moved around my shoulders and pushed the blanket down, uncovering my breasts, his fingers ran up and down my chest, making circles around my nipples and cupping my breasts. A moment later, when I felt like I was really losing control – already, I opened my eyes to find him gazing at me and without having any control over it, I lifted my head and kissed him passionately, my arms embracing him firmly and the last sane thought in my mind disappearing.

"Edward?" I finally breathed out his name.

"Good morning," he said and I looked at him for a moment, then answered, "it is a good morning, but…"

"Don't speak," he whispered and gave me another kiss.

I gave in and he continued where he'd stopped, or rather where I stopped him. The blanket was still covering me up to my waist and as his hand slid to my stomach, I shivered again. His lips and tongue continued down to my nipples and he licked and sucked on them greedily. He didn't stop there, though and after a moment, he moved down to my stomach, his teeth tenderly biting all the way down. He paused at my navel and buried his tongue into it, making my hips squirm. I raised my hand to his head and made him look at me, but his look told me not to talk, so I shifted a bit, leaned back on the pillows behind me and closed my eyes, my fingers grasping on the sheet.

I felt his hands pushing my legs apart and then his body moving between them. His fingers ran up from my knees and his lips placed soft kisses in their place. As he reached his goal, he looked up at me, waiting a moment until I opened my eyes and saw him down, between my legs. He didn't wait any longer and bent down, his tongue running over my nether lips and his hands holding my thighs open. He didn't need to; I moved my legs apart and watched his eyes gaze up at me before his tongue flicked over my clit and softly darted inside me.

"Edward," I breathed out, "come here."

He smiled and obeyed immediately, staying between my legs but sliding up my body.

"Hey," he placed a soft kiss on my lips and I could smell and taste myself, which only made me want him again and more, to my own surprise.

"Hey," I whispered and wrapped my arms around him. I pulled him as close as he could be and suddenly became aware of his hardness, now pushing against my thigh. I moved my leg closer to it and he took a deep breath, his lips leaving mine for a moment. He moved a bit until I feel his tip at my opening and I raised my lap to urge him inside. He smiled at me mischievously and his hand moved down to help him enter me. But he stayed on the edge until I lifted my sides up again to make him push deeper inside of me.

He looked at me and before he could tell me to stop, I kissed him passionately, pulled him down and put my hands on his bum, pushing him into me. At that, his self-control was lost and he moved in and out of me fast, just a few times before he got me to the edge and the moment I started trembling, I felt him pushing even deeper inside of me and felt the heat filling me.

He started to slip away as we came down from our high, but I didn't let him, wanting us to stay as close as we could.

The awareness of the fact that it was in some way a first time for us snuck up on me, as before this morning, whenever we'd slept together, we both were at least tipsy and didn't really know what we were doing. Though my mind tried to fill with thoughts again, deciphering why we were still in bed, why anything that happened this morning did happen at all, but I pushed them away, attempting to just enjoy the feeling of having him close.

"Bella?" he looked at me when we got back to our normal breath.

"What?" I whispered, still not in control of my voice.

"We should be sober every time," he smiled at me.

"Edward…" I looked at him and he kissed me softly.

"We really shouldn't need to get drunk to be like this," he continued, but I didn't get what he was saying.

"What do you mean?"

"I love you," he said quietly and I stared at him, not believing what I'd just heard.

"Wow."

"And I do know you like me," he smiled and blushed, "I heard you talking to Jasper last night."

"What did you hear?" I started freaking out a bit, still not remembering much of the evening.

"Just that you'd go to my place at any time," he kissed me again, "he tried to stop you from coming with me and you told him that even though it's all I can give you, you'll take it."

"I didn't say that," I blushed, finally recalling the moment we left the cafe.

"You did," I closed my eyes "look at me," he whispered and I obeyed, "but I realized it's not all I want to give you. Not just sex."

"What then?" I asked, tears coming to my eyes.

"I fell in love with you a long time ago, Bella, and I want to make love to you, I don't ever want to wake up and find out you left."

"I love you, too," I whispered, "and leaving you was the hardest part each time."

"You'll never have to do it again," he smiled and kissed me.


End file.
